Distance
by XxSenbonzakura KageyoshixX
Summary: She felt all alone for most of her life and suddenly everything changed. But for better or worse? I suck at summaries. MattxOC story. Rated for swearing and drama. R&R please.
1. Why

_Distance_

**Ok. I don't own Death Note, nor do I own Famous Last Words by My Chemical Romance **

**or I'm Not Okay(I Promise) by My Chemical Romance. I do, however, own Ren my oc. :D **

**My first fanfic, so I'm excited and nervous. Yeah…. Anyways, here it is! I apologize in **

**advance for the drama. It won't last long if I can help it.**

DONOTCROSSDONOTCROSSDONOTCROSSDONOTCROSSDONUTTOSSDONOTCROS

She stood there in the doorway and drew in a sharp breath. Was it for real? She furiously wiped at her eyes and opened them a second time to see that what she perceived was in fact real. L was back at Whammy's to visit! She let out an excited squeal that caused L to make a puzzled look, and then she hugged him.

"How long are you back for now L? It's been months!"

"Yes, it has been awhile now. Hmm… I'm staying for about 1 month this time. Then I go to work on a new case."

She tilted her head. He always told her what exactly what he was doing. Why didn't he just say what case it was? This made Ren very curious to find out.

"What case would that be?" She said with a smile she plastered on to look innocent.

"That's not important. Besides, you've never heard of it. It's a very small case."

The smile instantly came off her face. He never takes small cases, unless they interest him.

"Cut the bull shit, L. What case is it? Everyone knows you don't take small cases….."

Her eyes widened at the thought that instantly crossed her mind. Had he taken over the Kira case? No. Even L wouldn't, shouldn't, COULDN'T take that case. It was too dangerous. Ren wouldn't allow it for the life of her.

"No." She said firmly. "You lied."

He looked at her, bewildered.

"You're staying for **3** months, and you're NOT taking that case!!!!"

"That's not up for discussion. You are not the one who decides what I do. I decide for myself. I take care of myself. I don't need your approval."

He always treated Ren like she was a child. It wouldn't stand this time. She wasn't the kid L thought she was; she knew this was a dangerous case. Ren sure as hell would not let him take it up if she had anything to say about it. Out of habit, she started rubbing the IPod in her pocket.

"You don't even know what case it is."

"It's the Kira case. Am I right? I am right aren't I, Lawliet?"

"Call me by my alias."

"I don't care right now! I'm furious to find out the smartest man is making the dumbest move ever!"

"I will be fine and I'm staying in this room, so you have to find somewhere to stay. Find some of your friends to room with."

"Why can't I just stay in here with you? I do every time you come?"

L didn't answer. She knew just as well as he did that the words would sting if they came out. But it stung just as bad when they didn't. She just wanted him to say he wouldn't take the case. That now that she brought it up, he didn't know what he was thinking. That he would stay there with her for a while. But that wasn't going to happen and it hurt her deep in her heart.

"FUCK THIS!" She said as she stormed out of the room, slamming the door as the tears flowed from her eyes like a waterfall. She ran for the bathroom, and let her back slide down the tiles on the wall. She pulled out the IPod and shoved the headphones on her ears. The first song that came on made the tears even harder to control. She sang along with the song which attracted attention from the person she was in the bathroom with. The boy's bathroom, that is.

"Now I know that I can't make you stay.

But where's your heart?

But where's your heart?

But where's your?"

"You okay?" Said the young boy, who was a little confused to find a sobbing girl who just ran in crying and broke into song.

"I don't want to talk to anyone. I'm fine, anyway. A better question is why you are in the girls' bathroom?!"

"…..You're in the boy's room. That's how I know you're not okay. That, and the fact you're crying. But, maybe it's just that time of the month…"

"Shut up you…ugh." She couldn't insult anyone looking like this. She would never be taken seriously. But the last thing Ren expected was for this strange young boy to gripped hug her. But the hug felt comforting. Almost as though she had known him her whole life and he was a great friend. But she didn't even know what he looked like. Ren tried to sneak a look at him, but the tears in her eyes wouldn't allow it. He soon pulled away and shut the door.

"So no one sees **me **hugging a **girl** in the **boy's** bathroom. Awkward. Plus, your might be worried now about some weird boy coming in and seeing you here. You are probably popular." He proceeded to wipe her eyes of the remaining tears with the sleeves of his shirt.

"You didn't have to…It'll ruin your..."

"It's okay, I've got it. By the way, I'm Matt." He said, and he grinned.

"What gives you the idea I'm popular anyway?"

"Well, you're kind of pretty and you have that high and mighty thing about you. Not in a mean way, though."

Ren felt a small blush cross her face. She wasn't worried about matt seeing it, though. Ren had been crying so hard she must have had a really red face. Plus, Matt's face was partially red from his semi-embarrassing statement about how she looked. Was he just trying to help her feel better? He's a pretty nice kid.

"Come on, let's go to my dorm." Matt's paused as he reassessed his statement.

"I mean…uh…To get you a change of clothes and…… All right, I swear that didn't come out the way I wanted it to! Let me try to explain!"

She laughed. They just met, and it already felt familiar. She started getting up, which made Matt stop rambling and help her up.

"Just trust me and come. I promise I'm not a pedophile, a rapist, or a pervert contrary to Mello's beliefs. Oh, right Mello. I forgot about him. He'll probably be there. He's my dorm mate or whatever it's called. Don't pay attention to him if he's angry, which he most likely will be."

"Okay?" Ren said looking skeptically. Matt backed away to let Ren stand on her own. Then, Ren tried to move forward but her knees locked and she tripped over her feet only to be grabbed by Matt at the last moment. Ren sucked in the air through her teeth. Her legs had fallen asleep and they ached. She would have a hard time walking out. Matt wrapped her arm around his neck and supported her weight to help her walk.

"Are you going to be okay? I could get you to the nurse and grab a wheelchair or something."

"No, no it's fine. Really, the blood just rushed out of my head. I should be fine."

"So, why were you crying?" Matt said, standing still for a minute to look at her. His emerald green eyes peered deep into hers, almost as though he was searching her very essence for the answer. She dropped his gaze, finding the floor very interesting all of a sudden.

"Well…. L is here and I'm kind of mad at him. We got into a fight."

"So you know L personally? You should tell Mello if he gives you hell! He'd be so nice to you!"

"I'm not going to go around saying I know him just for special treatment! Plus, if I did all his possible successors would want me dead.

"True, so very true. But I don't want you dead."

"Oh please, I'm putting you through a lot right now. Like you don't wish you don't have to do this. I don't see you around a lot, so I don't think you have a social life. No offence."

"No, you pretty much have it. If it weren't for Mello I wouldn't have contact with the outside world. Of course I don't mind helping you. I just want one thing in return." She smiled at her yet again. He was so full of smiles. What's Matt trying to pull?

"Before I agree to anything, what is it?"

His face grew serious suddenly which frightened Ren.

"Another friend. You have to play X-Box 360 and other video games with me. Even if you suck."

She laughed and Matt looked very perplexed.

"That sounds like I still owe you! I love X-Box 360. As long as you have Halo 3, Left 4 Dead and Bioshock, that is."

Matt's eyes looked as though they would pop out at any moment.

"OF COURSE I DO! I never thought that you would know so much or be such a cool person!"

Ren furrowed her brows and leaned back.

"Okay?"

"Come on! Let's get back to my dorm to play some Left 4 Dead. I'm in the mood for killing zombies."

Ren smiled the first good, real, and happy smile she had in the whole conversation. As Matt went on and on about all his achievements while she just thought of what kind of person Mello would be. Matt looked down at her and smiled. Was he really that happy?

"I can tell you'll be a great friend, Ren."

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"_Well if you wanted honesty that's all you had to say. I never want to let you down or have you go, its better off this way." I'm Not Okay (I Promise) by My Chemical Romance_.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

**I hope you liked it! See my account for my reasons that I don't update. The end song I feel **

**fits the whole L and Ren thing, so since L doesn't really love music and won't find a **

**magical IPod sitting there with this song ready, I did this. I got the idea from **

**BrokenGlassWalkers fanfic, Difficulty. It's awesome, so go check it out. Seriously. NOW. **

**Was Matt out of character or just plain Weird? Reviews are amazing, you know? I hear **

**they rock and I believe I will respond to them. So, review because it's obvious I need to be **

**critiqued. My third time posting this one because of my problem with perfection.**


	2. First Impressions

**Ok. I don't own Death Note, nor will I own it. If I did, L, Matt, and Mello wouldn't die. In fact, they would be living with meh!:D Light would have never been born because his mom had one of those Final Destination moments and saw that he would become a murderer and divorced Soichiro Yagami. Then, Near stayed at Whammy's and stayed locked up in the toy room. CONGRATS TO XSORANDOMX AKA KISHI SENMATSU! WHOOT! She noticed the donut toss thing and said so in her review. So you get.....ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! HAHA! Jk. your reward is your OC fan art thing, I suppose. 0.o I am such a bitch. lol, no seriously. I'll color it and give you it soon enough, mk? Sorry about taking forever on the updates. School is really screwing with my schedule. Broken Glass Walker is no long Broken Glass Walker, so the recommendation I just gave you last time? Won't work unless you look up her under her new name, which is Mayu Koizume. Now here are my replies to the reviews. :D They make meh so happy!**

**Mayu Koizumi- Thank you. It means a lot to me that you would say that. It wouldn't be Mello if he wasn't. lol. I just hope I can find the ability to write the right amount of swears and evilness that is Mello.**

**Kishi Senmatsu- Are me and Lea the only ones not changing our names?!?! Lol. No, your story kicks some major ass (GO CHECK IT OUT PEOPLES!). I would love to help you with that. When you stay at my house, we're stealing Alyssa's scary movies! WHOOT!**

**LadyWillowTree- Heheh... About keeping you waiting....I'm not good at doing that. :( blame stupid school. I do.:D Thanks for reading and reviewing. (Check her stories to!)**

**Now that that is done, on with the chapter!**

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She smiled back at him. Matt looked bored suddenly. He sighed.

"So, are we going to stand here all day, or are we gonna go kick some zombie ass?!?!"

Ren laughed for a split second, then Matt started dragging her through the halls. She gasped but felt grateful her legs decided to work again as she sprinted to keep pace with him. _IF HE NEVER LEAVES HIS ROOM, WHY DOES HE RUN SO DAMN FAST!?!??! _She thought sourly.

Finally, he stopped in front of room number 190.

"This is it." He said with a proud smile which quickly faded to a frown. I heard pages flipping furiously inside.

"Shit. Mello's home. Okay, no sudden moves. If he tries to hurt you, threatens you, or says something to you, run like hell."

Ren rolled her eyes and opened the door. What she saw was quite odd. A young blond boy was hunched over a paper with books piled up around him.

"Dammit, Matt! Shut the door! If you're here to play video games, put them on mute. I'm working."

Working he was, but when Matt didn't answer he got angry, or angrier I should say, he stood up and turned around to notice Matt was gone. Coward.

"Who the hell are you?" He spat sourly to her.

"Ren. Matt brought me here."

"You must be a hooker. Listen, I don't care how much Matt is paying you, he's not 18."

"No, no, you don't understand. I'm a friend of Matt's, I guess."

"Why are you here? As any normal person would notice, he isn't here and I'm trying to work."

"Why are you working so hard. It's the weekend. Shouldn't you be out with Matt or you're other friends. Why study so hard when you already work hard in class."

"None of your business, woman!" He retorted in a disgusted tone. It made Ren flinch.

"I don't even know you! Get the hell out of my dorm, now!"

"What if I don't? What then, Mello?"

He glared at her, pure anger evident on his face. Mello lashed out and pushed her down, causing her to slam her head violently onto the wall. Mello peeped out to see he had knocked her unconscious.

"Oh shit."

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**Sorry It's so short. My mother kicked me off, so yeah.... ANYWAY! I will probably be updating sooner now.:D School might be deciding to cooperate. And when Pookie (Yes, Pookie)moves back, He can help me with school work! WHOO HOO! Later, peoples!**


	3. Smell Of Death

**Mk. Thanks to all those who favorite this story and me! Whoo! You rock.:D As do my reviewers. I made this chapter kinda long, so I hope that makes up for the last chapter where Mello might have been Out Of Character. Tell me if I have any problems with anything. I will jump right into the reviews, since I'm being told to get the hell off the laptop RIGHT now. Hehe. Special thanks to....**

**Kishi Senmatu-Lol, thanks. I'll be sure to read your next chapter (AS SHOULD EVERYONE!) and review it. Your going to royally piss Mello off one day! Lol. Um. Yeah, you yelled at me about the length thing, remember? This chapter is longer, so I hope that makes up for it.  
**

**LadyWillowTree-Yeah, but that makes us special, right?I'll start your fanfic again this weekend, because Pookie has kinda been stressing me a bit ( :P ) and then, theres school again. (GO READ HER STORY _INDIGO EYES AND AND A SWEET SMILE_!!!!!)**

_**IMPORTANT NOTE! **_

**The whole chapter is from Ren's point of view. I think that's it. I do not own Death Note or Rumors Of My Demise Have Been Greatly Exaggerated by Rise Against. I do own my OC whose name is Ren.:D I am writing this is the wee hours of the morn (Because SOMEONE kept yelling at me) so I apologize if it sucks. Enjoy anyway!:D  
**

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**Brightness engulfed me. Was I dead? No, I couldn't be. It sure as hell looked it, though. All I saw was brightness and white all blurred together. As I looked around, I was sure I wasn't dead. I saw Mello. The fact that I saw him reassured me. But where was Matt? It didn't make sense I was in a room with Mello without Matt here to have dragged him along without his consent. He flipped open a cell and typed something in it. He then proceeded to close it and slide it into his tight pants pocket. Where did he find the room?!?! He turned to look at me.

"Finally, you're awake. I've been waiting for forever. Matt will be here in a minute." He said, then turned back to look out the window he sat next to. He put his head in his hand and rested his elbow on the windowsill. He looked tired. Mello needed a break from studying. I tried to lean forward, which earned a sharp warning pain that made me wince It radiated from the back of my head outwards. I leaned back only to notice I had a neck brace on. What the hell happened to me? I don't remember anything after Mello slammed the door shut in my face. Mello saw me in my pain and a look of panic crossed his face for the slightest second. It was quickly removed and he rolled his eyes as he sighed at my stupidity, or that was what it was to him at least.

"Try not to move so much. You'll get hurt worse than you are."

"What happened to me? I don't remember much after you slammed the door."

"Oh, I shoved you, you fell back and hit your head. Matt yelled at me, called the nurse, and we brought you here. A few days passed, then you woke up, and here we are."

" A few DAYS?!?!? What, was I in a COMA?!"

"No, not really. You were just drugged. Really, really heavily drugged."

"That's a nice though. No wonder my head's so cloudy."

Right then, Mello got up and left. Just up and left. As he exited the doorway, he flicked a small wave to me with his hand. Or maybe he was just waving me off along with my worrying. As soon as he left, Matt popped in the doorway with his usual huge grin. I suppose he was happy to see me awake. What I was concerned with, however, is why he wasn't here when I awoke and why Mello of all people filled his spot.

"Well? Are you going to just stand there smiling like a mad man, or are you coming in?" I teased him. Apparently I went too far, because a frown came across his face. Tears welled up slightly in his eyes. If I wasn't so used to sadness, I wouldn't even notice them.

"Matt, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to-" She was cut off by a hug. This was the second time this had happened in the few days the knew each other. I think Mello makes him very hug deprived. The hug must have lasted a few minutes. He just held still while I cried. Partly from the fact he cared about me enough to miss me that much, and partly from the fact that my head was throbbing from his hug. I wasn't going to tell him his hug hurt me though. I could barely feel the pain with his comfort shielding me from the pulled back and looked at me, the tears in his eyes gone and my shoulder feeling some-what wet and the tears in my eyes still very prominent. Why is it that whenever he sees me, I am crying? Matt smiled again and wiped my tears away. That was his other habit. Removing my tears and replacing them with a smile. Sure enough, as soon as his hand left my face a smile replaced it.

"I'm sorry I wasn't right there when you woke up like Mello was. I had to make a chocolate run."

"You eat chocolate?" Matt laughed. That shot down my deduction. No you see why I'm not very high in the ranking at Whammy's.

"No, Mello does. He doesn't eat much else."

"What's your thing?" Everyone at Whammy's had something. I had singing, Near (1st at Whammy's) has toys, and apparently Mello has chocolate. I was very curious to see what Matt's was.

"Heh. I kinda have 2. Video games and....uhm.."

"Do you smell smoke?"

"Not very often. I'm used to it." I gave him a confused look.

"My other thing is smoking." My mouth hung agape, eyes widened to the size of saucers, and tears slid back into my eyes. Lots of things ran through my head at that point. _He's too young to smoke. It'll kill him. Is he stupid? Who is giving him the cigarettes? If I find out, I'll kill them before smoking can kill him. Doesn't he know smoking kills? Doesn't he know that if he dies I'll have no one left?_

Tears now ran freely from my eyes as I collapsed into his arms sobbing hysterically. He held me there for several minutes, rubbing my head and back softly. After several moments I lifted my hand and with all the power I had left, shoved it into Matts' shoulder. Needless to say all the power I had left wasn't very much. He didn't even move.

"Whats wrong?"

"That.....was supposed....t-to hu-hurt." I had been crying so hard, I could barely breath. I had a huge headache, but my crying was nowhere near done. But I don't think that Matt smoking bother me as much as I believed it did. I just wanted that to be the reason. To hide the selfish truth that was just below the surface. The fact of the matter was that I didn't want him to die and leave me alone. I could never be alone. It was so childish. So irrelevant, because even if I tried to make him, he would not stop smoking. A terrible addiction that would inevitably kill him. There was no way around it, and I couldn't stand it. Reality. Its a harsh thing. It's even worse when it hits you all at once. Sometimes, it can even hit you hard enough to break you. Just as it did to me. I began to repeat the process of crying into Matt like he was a tissue, without the nose blowing. He was so warm, so soft, and smelled like smoke with a small hint of death.

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**_"Please Don't Ask Me How I Ended Up At My Wits End And Breaking Down." Rumors Of My Demise Have Been Greatly Exaggerated by Rise Against_**

**So? Too dramatic? I thought so. Lea thought so. Do you? Anyone out of character? Not much conversation.  
**


	4. Selfish

**Mk. Thanks to all those who favorite this story and me! YAY! I think somewhere along the line of the fanfic (If it ever gets popular) I shall have a poll or a first review gets a (Blank) thing, because it would just be kinda fun.:D I will, however, need help with the pairing towards the end. I have no idea who she will end up with right now. 0.o That's pretty sad. The options so far are L, Mello, or Matt. Tell me what you think so far in a review. (I'm trying to make up excuses to MAKE you review. lol. I'm so evil. :K) Oh! So, Ima finish this up and get on with the reviews. Sorry for getting side tracked.  
**

**Kishi Senmatsu-Idk if you noticed it, but last time I miss-spelled your name. You didn't yell at me, so I;m guessing you didn't.:D Yeah, I know you did. I do as well, but uhm.. You know. I meant to the point where no amount of chocolate will bribe him to stay. Maybe if we gave him some of Tony's European chocolate, though. ;) IT WAS SO NOT SHORT! It took me almost a whole night to write. Maybe that's because I was doing other stuff too....NO! FORGET I SAID THAT! Where's YOUR new chapter?!?! Yeah, I went there! lol. no, jk. I think Lea's assertiveness has rubbed off on me. 0.o I actually started this the day RIGHT after I update last! SO HAH!!!:P Yeah, when I threatened you and those non-existent children of yours, the reviews never came. Serously, you were the only one who reviewed. I REVOKE ALL INTENTIONS OF HARMING ANYTHING YOU HAVE NEVER GIVEN BIRTH TO! I have no intentions of no longer harming you, though.  
**

**LadyWillowTree-Lol. Matt has some lady problems, huh? Thanks, and I'm not sure if that's the best thing ever, but it's awesome to ME! lol. I'm glad SOMEONE was happy with the length. Ok, when I go to school on Monday, I'll walk up to the building and yell "STOP BEING DIFFICULT!!!!" I will. Then, when I get a hold of Pimp Master Puff, I'll tell him he HAS to be non difficult. He reads the fanfics, so I'm asking him to help me. He writes AWESOMELY, just like you guys, and will help me move the plot along maybe. **

**IT HAS COME TO MY ATTENTION! I have yet to describe the character. 0.o Yeah, so ima do that in this chapter. *Cough* ....Uhm....Sorry about that... heheh....:3  
**

**Ebony Daggers-Yeah, I keep trying to kill the drama, but it keeps coming back...The crying did feel a little odd. I didn't go into as much detail as I wanted too. For that, I apologize. :( But I am very happy to have new reviewers.:D I will try my hardest to update.**

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0-Cool name. lol. I appreciate that you like my story so much.:D It makes me all happy and stuff. Pookie is my brother (Just so it doesn't confuse anyone). Thanks for the review. I appreciate having the new reviewers! Thanks for the Mello compliment. I wasn't sure if I had Mello right or not. It angers me when I can't tell if he's Out Of Character or not, you that helps me alot. Thanks for the review!:D**

**Wow. My reviewers are the shiz! Smeriously! Just, go check they're stories out! They're awesome!:D NOW!  
**

** Well, I don't own Death Note, It's Not Over by Secondhand Serenade, or Everchanging by Rise Against. I do own my OC Ren. With that said and done, ENJOY THE NEXT CHAPTER!**

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**The tears slowed and slowed to the point that they finally stopped. But the sobs didn't stop as easily. Matt waited until I silenced completely before puling back to look at me. I turned away, letting my amber hair cover her face. I couldn't bare to look at him in this state. This was so cliche'. He was protecting me in my fragile state. He was the calm and comforting guy. I was the broken down and at her wits end girl. I had arrived at Whammy's a little over 6 months ago, and some of my wounds were still fresh. What happened to me still burned deep in my heart. It still mentally and physically hurts me, and now the addition of the new wound made by L made me so breakable, so fragile, as if the slightest thing (like finding out Matt smokes) will break me to the point where I am unfix-able. Hopefully Matt didn't blame himself. I not mad at him, I'm just mad at myself for being so weak. Matt lifted my chin to look at me. I looked into his green eyes as he stared right back into my blue eyes.

"I'm....sorry." I mumbled. Matt just stared at me, never dropping my gaze. Normally this would be awkward but right now, it felt comforting. Almost everything that Matt did for me was comforting. Matt smiled at me and pressed the button on the counter.

"You cried so much, I figured you would want an aspirin." He smiled again. Obviously he thought that him being a smart ass was funny. Yeah, Matt. Hilarious.

"Would you go and get my IPod for me, Matt?" He looked at me oddly and nodded his head slowly.

"O-okay? Yeah, just let me get Mello so he can stay here with you. I don't want you to be left here alone."

"No, it's fine. Just go. It won't take long, the nurse will be here soon, and if Mello were here, he wouldn't really say or do anything. I'm fine. It's right in the office. They're holding it for me. It won't take very long." I smiled at him. He laughed a bit and the nodded.

With that he got up and left like Mello had. Like L had. I was in the hospital and L hadn't even bothered to come visit me. Didn't I matter? I knew the answer to that question before it was even asked. No, I was just a burden. I just caused pain for people. Problems. That was all I was. I was difficult. I knew what I had to do, though. I had caused problems for L. There was nothing I could do about that. The past is unchangeable. Nothing I can do but apologize. I don't deserve forgiveness, nor do I expect it. I have caused some problems for Matt. I had troubled him from the very moment we met. More can be done about that. I have to apologize. I never will expect or deserve forgiveness from anyone. Especially from Matt. Then we have Mello. The only thing that could have possible troubled him from me was this injury I have. It was my fault, yet again. I pushed him when I shouldn't have. I had to apologize. Though being the one who makes peoples lives miserable, I can't even have to courage to do it in person. All I can do is leave. Leave before Matt and Mello can begin to get dragged into the drama. The pain. Before it will hurt them that I leave.

I looked around for a piece of paper and something to write with as I sang.

_But now it's over, it's over, why is it over?  
We had the chance to make it  
Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over  
I wish that I could take it back  
But it's over_

_I lose myself in all these fights  
I lose my sense of wrong and right  
I cry, I cry  
It's shaking from the pain that's in my head  
I just wanna crawl into my bed  
And throw away the life I led  
But I won't let it die, but I won't let it die_

_But now it's over, it's over, why is it over?  
We had the chance to make it  
Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over  
I wish that I could take it back_

_I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart_

I found a card envelope and a pen someone dropped in the hallway and began writing.

_I can't say much, because I don't have much time before the nurse gets here or Matt comes back, so I'll come out and say it. __I'm leaving. It's no ones fault but my own. I cause too much pain and suffering to drag you down with me. And so, you will never have to deal with me ever again. L, I am sorry I was always so demanding. It's my fault that everything has happened to me not yours. I should never have had taken it out on anyone. Especially you. Especially Matt. Matt, I am sorry I burdened you and Mello. I made you worry. That won't happen anymore. I'm sorry Mello. I am the one who caused this. You didn't do anything wrong. It's all my fault, and so, I am forever out of all of your lives._

_Goodbye,_

_Ren._

I put the envelope onto the bed and changed into my clothes. I left the hospital, the room, the envelope, and my only friends behind selfishly. As I walked towards Whammy's, I thought about all my reasons. I didn't want to hurt anyone. Never again would I want to hurt someone like I hurt L. Or maybe I just didn't want to get hurt again. Like I got hurt when my parents died and no one in the family wanted me. Like when L walked out of my life, probably forever. I didn't want that to be the case with Matt and Mello. So selfishly, I hurt them before they could hurt me. I entered Whammy's and left very quickly. All I needed was clothes, money, blankets, and my IPod, which was at Whammy's. I lied. Another selfish thing done by me. Not surprising. I left a note for Roger. It simply said "I have run away. Don't come looking for me. I have taken my allowance and anything else I would need. Goodbye." As soon as I got outside again, the words ran through my head over and over, stinging me each time. Wrenching my heart.

_I hurt them before they could hurt me. I hurt them before they could hurt me. I hurt them. I hurt them. Selfish bitch.  
_

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**_"Well something has kept me here to long, and you can't leave me, if I'm already gone_****_" Everchanging by  Rise Against_**

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_So? Too dramatic? Well....Yeah, it was... Anyone out of character? Did it confuse anyone? Come to early? Generally SUCK? idk. I wrote THIS one in the morning.:D And this chapter was long this time. 1,217 words long. YAY!  
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	5. Home

**Mk. Thanks to all those who favorite this story and me! Just to let people know, the voting for the character to end up with Ren is not open, BUT keep telling me who you think should end up with her. It is very helpful for writing new chapters to let me know how to progress the romance. Try to beleive this, mk. The last chapter, with all the drama and crying and running away, was written while listening to I'm On A Boat by The Lonely Island. Seriously. Just thought you should know.:D The songs for the romance has one! MEaning I have one song about relationships (If it counts)But idk who it's for. Check it out and tell me (If you want). The song is Over And Over by Three Days Grace. (KRISTIN!!! TIS YOUR FAULT!) On witht teh reviews!  
**

**Kishi Senmatsu-Aww! I'm happy to talk to you too!:D Yeah, I keep stabbing the drama with BB' knife, but it keeps.......IT KEEPS ORIHIME'ING ITS SELF!!!! OKAY?!?! I explained it to you in the car, ok? She'll live with Nessie.....*INSERT INSIDE JOKE ABOUT NOT EATING* The running away is what CREATES the romance for Mello. Kinda...I GUESS! Wow. I yell you a lot. But then again, you yell at me too. We're YELL BUDDIES!! WHOOT!  
**

**LadyWillowTree-No, I just REALLY like yelling at in-animate objects! A building is a step up from a laptop and an IPod, you know. Yeah, Ren's a drama whore... WHOO! ONE VOTE FOR CRADLE ROBBER!!!!:D I will try to make them get off their asses and fight for their woman.:D I shalst. And good, because I just finished R&R-ing ALL of your chapters, and now I wants to readmes MORE!  
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**Ebony Daggers-0.0 3 people for Matt so far! Wow, Matt must be a real romantic or something. That's a good idea.....I might have to borrow/steal (If you don't mind) that plot twist thingy for if she ends up with Matt.... L would be nice, but he seems cradle robbery-ish to me if he ends up with this teenage girl.0.o No, I understood. I'm suprised my "LOGIC" hasn't confused anyone yet. If you can call it "LOGIC", that is.  
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**0o grimmjow schiffer o0-Of course I did! Why, thank you.:3 That's so nice of you to say.:D You made my week! YAY FOR HAPPY! Ok. MATT MATT MATT MATT has a lot of people rooting for him. Interesting...... Well. I'm sad. I probably can not update very fast. Jk, I'm writing a lot lately, so update will be coming at least once a week I think. If time permits. Whoo! Thanks for the reviews, reading, and faveing!:D  
**

**He he! I have consistant reviewers! I feel special. I will be updating at least 2 times a week, but will let you know if for ANY reason the updates are/will be late. The reasons will be on my profile, at the very top in **_Italics _Underlined **and Boldfaced!:D WHOO! So, uhm....check it out when you can. Tis not mandatory. DURING THE TIME BETWEEN say..... NOVEMBER 20th AND NOVEMBER say...........DECEMBER 1st I WILL PROBABLY EITHER NOT UPDATE AS MUCH OR UPDATE MORE. The reason will be that POOKIE COMES BACK! WHOO! And I need to spend some time hurting him and pretending I have a life.:D**

** Well, I don't own Death Note, Runaway by Cartel, or Climb Trees by Sage Francis. I do own my OC Ren. I feel bad. I changed it from 3rd person, to Ren's point of view. I believe that that's first person? Heheh.... ENJOY THE NEXT CHAPTER!  
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**The cold air stung at my nose. Damn. Why don't they make nose gloves? Or nose hats? Maybe even nose socks!?!? Deep in though as I was, I tripped over a rock and fell into the snow. Face planting into snow. What fun it was. How it gets your hair cold and wet. My normally pale skin became very red, not only with embarrassment, but with the pain of the impact and the sudden cold. I hadn't noticed, but I had a neck brace on. It got wet and soggy, and snow got stuck between it and my skin. People laughed and giggles as they walked by. Some little kid stood pointing and yelling "MOMMIE!!! MOMMIE!!! LOOK! IT'S A SNOW LADY!"

"SCREW YOU!" I snapped at the kid. He ran crying to his mom.

"HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!" I yelled after them. I got up again and started walking. I was heading towards the local park. They have a really big doll house thing I can live in until the police come. As I walked, I began singing. People stared as I had a very odd fashion sense. Duffel bag, neck brace, covered in snow, hair a mess from fore-mentioned snow, and a blanket wrapped around me. Now, on top of that, I was singing at the top of my lungs. Like you do when your alone and your favorite song starts playing. Only I wasn't happy. I was singing for the fact that it gave me something to do and think about while I walked. That, and the song in my head ironically fit.

_Face down; this is where it leads you - too far.  
Buried covered now, you'll find peace - in the earths aground.  
Stop now, there's no point in breathing - it's not allowed.  
On the surface, how can you find - reason to move on?_

_Until then you can runaway.  
Do your best to hide your face.  
And oh I know you best;  
I know you get what you get - you get what you deserve._

_Hush now, don't say a word - its out in the open,  
tell me how can you deal with all this weight?  
Speak now, you must have a secret  
Kept Down, down where you can keep it - I need you to spill your guts._

_Until then you can runaway,  
Do your best to hide your face.  
And oh I know you best.  
I know you get what you get - until then you can runaway.  
Do your best to hide your face.  
And oh I know you best.  
I know you get what you get you - get what you deserve._

_Speak now you must have a secret kept down,  
Down where you can keep it - I need you to spill your guts._

_Until then you can runaway,  
Do your best to hide your face.  
And oh I know you best.  
I know you get what you get - until then you can runaway.  
Do your best to hide your face.  
And oh I know you best,  
I know you get , now you get what you,  
You get what you get, you get what you,  
You get what you get, and oh you get what you deserve.  
_

I stopped in front of the gates to the park. This was my temporary new home. Well, time to get settled in. Or, I was ABOUT TO, when someone bumped into me sending my stuff flopping onto the ground along with me.

"What the FUCK?!" I yelled at the culprit.

"Who do you think you are?! Don't just STAND there like an idiot, pick this shit up!" The person stood there. I looked up to see an older man.

"What do you want, old person?"

"Your going home."

"WHOA!!! RAPIST!!! STRANGER DANGER!!!! uhm.......uhm.....HELP!!!! STRANGER DANGER!!!!! OLD PERV!!!!" He rolled his eyes, grabbed my stuff and me and dragged me to an expensive car. Thank god! I saw a police officer walking by! I opened the door and started yelling KIDNAPPER KIDNAPPER! Sure enough, the cop stopped and caught the old man. YES!

"Is there a problem?" He said, not the least bit worried.

"Is there any proof that you own this child?"

"YEAH, IS THERE?!?!" I yelled from the passengers seat.

"I can handle this, ma'am." The cop said, giving me an odd look.

"Here are her papers. She belongs to me." The cop looked over them, look at me, and nodded.

"Have a nice day." He said as he walked off. The old person smiled at him and me, and then got into the car.

"Please refrain from making a scene." I stared at him bewildered.

"You don't even know me!"

"Ren." I stared at him like he was crazy.

"Well, then who are YOU? For all I know, you're a pedophile!"

"I am Watori. I work for L. He requested your immediate return. You, young lady, are in a lot of trouble." He was smiling through the whole thing. He even laughed when he said I was in trouble! Old people. Pft, who needs em?

"Well, I am not going back there! You wasted your time doing this, and caused yourself trouble, and probably more trouble by taking me."

"That's a risk L was willing to make. Your head is injured, and you were walking around in the snow. You don't seem very bright."

"I was raised at Whammy's, of course I am smart!" I lied. It's not like I PERSONALLY know him anyway. We rode in the car to Whammy's, the rest of the time remaining silent. As we pulled onto the long and twisting road leading to the gates of the orphanage, I sighed. L was going to have a bitch flip, and I just plain and simple did NOT want to face Mello and Matt. Matt would be mad and sad I left, and Mello would be mad I left him to have to listen to his hurt BEST FRIEND all the time. The wrought iron gates opened and closed with a bang. He pulled up to the front where L was waiting. I couldn't tell if he was angry, sad, or disappointed. He just looked....tired. Which was normal! I swallowed hard and got out, my legs feeling weak. I stood in front of him, my head down in shame. He just grabbed my arm hard and tugged me into the orphanage with a lot of force.

"Grounded. No allowance. 3 months. No, 5. Room." He was hissing his words as he forcefully dragged me along, earning stares and whipseres from other children who idolized him. Probably wondering what I had done to so royally piss off L. We stopped in front of Matt and Mello's room. He opened the door and practically threw me in.

"Stay." Was all he managed to say. He shut the door, locked it and left. I just stayed there. Sitting on the floor of Matt and Mello's room. Breathing in the air. The smell. It smelt of Mello(Chocolate and leather). It smelt of Matt (Junk food, cologne, and rubber from his gloves and goggles). I didn't even turn on the lights. I eventually just laid down on the carpet and closed my eyes. I had had a rough day. I didn't fall asleep. I didn't hear the door unlock, nor did I hear said door open, but I sure as hell heard Mello ranting. Then Matt saw me, as did Mello, but that didn't stop him.

"Mello, shut up! She's sleeping."

'I DON'T GIVE A DAMN! SHE CAN WAKE THE FUCK UP!" I decided to play like I was asleep, though I wasn't from the beginning. Matt picked me up, which was unexpected. I almost opened my eyes, so I tossed in his arms, which almost sent me flying out of them. He put me onto the bottom bunk of the bunk bed and let me rest.

"I can't believe she has to stay here with us! This dorm is not made to house 2 people and that girl over there!" Matt said nothing. He just sat down in his beanbag chair and started his X-Box 360. Left 4 Dead.

"I mean, doesn't she have her own room?! Not that I don't respect L, but I have to beat Near! I can't do that with that....WOMAN in our room! It's bad enough with the both of us, between YOUR video games and junk food, and MY studying (Books) and chocolate!"

Matt continued ignoring him. Seeing his rants got him nowhere, Mello stopped talking. After awhile, I really did fall asleep. Long after Mello had, so I drew the conclusion this was Matt's bed. But it looked neat. Used, but not recently. I waited quite some time before falling asleep, hoping Matt would rest soon. He never did. I woke up at 7:00 AM, and he was still playing. I fell back asleep. I wanted to prolong the anger and frustration until much later. As long as I could. The words rung in my head again as I laid there.

_Cowardly. Selfish. Worthless. Bitch._

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**_"Whisper... to my ear hole... tell me not to be fearful. Be careful not to make any... sudden... movements. " Climb Trees by Sage Francis_**

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_So? Too dramatic? Well....Yeah, it was...It always is... Anyone out of character? Did it confuse anyone? Come to early? Generally SUCK? DO I annoy anyone? RANDOM MUFFIN! o.0 that was just....Im a little embarrased. That was neither here, nor there. It was right here!!!!:3 Got any Ideas for couple songs and/or next chapter songs?!?!? I NEED THEM!! SERIOUSLY! I am removing L from the race. I am sorry, but after this chapter....Well, he seems more fatherly or big brotherly to me. Tell me if I am COMPLETELY STUPID, BITCH! For doing this.:D uhm, was the song stupid? Did it make sense? Does anyone BUT KRISTIN (You don't count for this!) Know Sage Francis? I ave almost killed the drama!:D whoot! Kks, R&R! I know this chapter was kinda bumpy and poopie, but I had to have her come home SOMEHOW! and the way I had planned before was...... odd.0.o So, there it was. Not the best chapter, but not BAD, right? :( I honestly do not  
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	6. Comfort

**Thank GOD for My Chemical Romance for giving me inspiration in the dead of night! I need some song recommendations. Basically anything BUT country. Please, country makes me die inside. Jonas Brothers and Miley Cyrus piss me off too, so yeah. COUGH! This chapter will develop MattxRen a little further. I killed MELLOXREN! ITS NOT HAPPENING ANYMORE! There, happy? I have a MelloxOC story I don't update, but maybe if someone read and reviewed. *Wink wink hint hint*. Yeah, that's all I'ma say. Don't pay attention to me. I'm weird. Kristin's going to yell at me for yelling now, so I'ma go hide. 0.0 I AM STILL LOOKING FOR SONGS! I only got one recommendation, so please! I NEEDS MORE! Okay. Glad to say that. ONTO DA REVIEWS!  
**

**Kishi Senmatsu- Lol. If I were to use YOU for Mello, that would mean you Rape and sexually harass your Imaginary Friend JUST LIKE KAYLA!!! SMOOTH! As if Mello needed another remote incident. 0.0 Well, thank you.:D Yeah, I do too, but I had her staying out longer ALL PLANED OUT IN MY HEAD, then when I went to write it....... I forgot it. - yeah... Matt? And like when you told me the past 4 times in ur reviews.:D lol. Yeah, I did. You know how I said Allie doesn't like my dad? She used to talk about the most DISGUSTING stuff at the dinner table, including that. Yeah. Tell this to Mello. Your average chocolate bar has about 2-1/2 house flies (The big flies) in it.:D THERE'S MELLO'S PROTEIN!!! -_- Too late for that? I SAW YOU LEAVE AFTER YOUR VACCINATION!! I GOT MINE! But I feel sick right now. (I felt sick before the shot, too.) And now my mom thinks I have swine flu! XD  
**

**LadyWillowTree- Heheh. Sorry for taking away your vote. 0.o But he does, doesn't he? Oh well. Everyone needs a Pookie figure.:D You and everyone else, Lea. GASP! THAT MEANS YOU HAVE CONFORMED!!!0.0 LEA! I tried. Tis hard. OH WELL! I got sick, so I couldn't. Sorry. People keep voting for Matt. :( Mello feels sad and stuff. (if he can feel emotion.0.0) Whatever. Mello has no love, because he can no longer be with Ren, so HA! IN UR FACE, MELLO!  
**

**Ebony Daggers-Kewl! That makes sense, they would be kinda cute together. :3 I will try my hardest to make that come across.:)  
**

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0-=_= you ish lucky I have multiple Ninja Muffins that poop out random muffins daily! 0.0 I am so sorry. Uncalled for. . . Okay, I checked out that song, and it is pretty good. I think I will use it, but it is a bit too up-tempo for the drama currently happening. Matt has. He even took Mello's place. The lazy gamer needs a lot of room to be romantic, apparently. 0.o OH WELL!  
**

**He he! I have constant reviewers! I feel special. I will be updating at least 2 times a week, but will let you know if for ANY reason the updates are/will be late. The reasons will be on my profile, at the very top in **_Italics _Underlined **and Boldfaced!:D WHOO! So, uhm....check it out when you can. Tis not mandatory. DURING THE TIME BETWEEN say..... NOVEMBER 20th AND NOVEMBER say...........DECEMBER 1st I WILL PROBABLY EITHER NOT UPDATE AS MUCH OR UPDATE MORE. The reason will be that POOKIE COMES BACK! WHOO! And I need to spend some time hurting him and pretending I have a life.:D **

**Oh, and I have a bit of writer block, so yeah. I feel like every time I try to write, the paper punches me in the face and is all like "BITCH! YOU CANT WRITE ON ME! IT WONT MAKE SENSE!:P" So yeah. There's my screwed up interpretation. 0.o  
**

** Mello is a complete DOUCHE in this chapter, so yeah. BEWARE! Well, I don't own Death Note or The Approaching Curve by Rise Against. I do own my OC Ren.  
**

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Leaving my eyes closed and my mind open left room for the thoughts to flood without a chance to escape. I stayed there, laying on the bed thinking. About Matt. About Mello. About L. About anything and everything. About absolutely nothing. I caught small glimpses of the conversation carried between Mello and Matt, and Matt and his "friends" he played X-Box 360 with. The faint clicking and gunshots from Matt's game was like my very own, personalized background music. As Mello and Matt's conversation died, the hunger in my stomach grew. I figured it was getting close to lunch time, having already missed breakfast. I guess Matt was hungry too, because he paused his game and left mumbling something like "Be back soon." My original plan was to wait until Mello left, but it was very boring laying there, and quite frankly, I was hungry. Like, eat a fucking horse hungry. In hopes that the bitchy blond was deep in his studying yet again, I got out of bed as quietly as I could. Soon enough, I was at the doorway. As I turned the knob as slowly as I could, I felt proud of myself. Apparently my ninja skills had just kicked in or something, because I felt very stealthy having accomplished my break-out.

"So you decide to wake up after Matt leaves?" Shit. So close, yet so far away. I bit my lower lip and turned around to face the music, fearing the worst. With Mello, fearing the worst outcome was the best thing someone could do, because the worst possible outcome was the best with him. He stood there, proud of himself. He had his hands on his hips and a smirk on his face. Scrutinising me like the asshole he is.

"Well, I was going to wait until YOU left, but I'm hungry and only human." He rolled his eyes, not buying it apparently.

"Right. You just didn't want to get hell from Matt about running away and leaving us." His words stung. He continued, even though I am positive he saw me flinching and cringing at his words. Maybe he just wanted it to hurt.

"You aren't the only one who had a bad life growing up. We all did. Me. Matt. Almost everyone at Whammy's had it hard, but they sucked it up and just got on with their lives. What makes you think you're so special that you need attention 24-7?" Tears started to form in the corners of my eyes, but I refused to show them to Mello. To shed them on his words would only give him satisfaction.

"You aren't anything special. If anything, you should be begging forgiveness from Matt and L and thanking us. Ungrateful." The tears were more prominent now. Beginning to be inhibiting my sight and just about ready to start falling down my face.

"Are you crying? Tears will get you nowhere. I'm done." He shook his head and pushed past me to the door. He stopped.

"Of all people that deserve the right to cry about their life, Matt should. You don't deserve him."

He left, walking right out the door and slamming it upon his exit. I stayed standing there for god knows how long. The tears in my eyes were almost completely dry when Matt walked in. He didn't notice me at first, but after he closed the door and turned around, a look of shock came across him. I lunged forward and hugged him hard, knocking the food out of his hangs and onto the floor.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Truly, very." I said, squeezing him tightly. He gently rubbed my back and hugged me softly, resting his chin on the top of my head smiling.

"It's okay."

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_**"L****ong since dried, when we are found, are the tears in which we had drowned. As we were, so perfect, so happy." The Approaching Curve by Rise Against  
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_So? Too dramatic? I am slowly burning the drama with acid from lemons.:D Yeah, It'll take some time, but the first place I burned was its eyes, mouth and ears.:D Ah, I am so messed up. 0.o I have said too much. Ima leave now. Please R&R. Yeah, bies.......0.0  
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	7. Life A Bit Easier

**Well, I am listening to Tenacious D Master Exploder, so that should explain if this chapter comes out weird. 0.o Uhm... I need some songs still.... I have 4 now, but more are welcome. Some sad ones. I have gotten complains for Mello being an ass. For this, I apologise. He was important for Ren to be with Matt. So he just helped with the romance by being a jerk! Mello will be nice (in his way)  
**

**Kishi Senmatsu- HAHA! As I read your review, the Mormon commercial came on!XD I noe. Good luck with that. 0.o You just really want to curse bad, don't you? Has Eric been bribing you to curse again!!??!?! Oh, he says he's be glad to, but I told him I have it covered. BUt the drama will be resurrected for a future chapter. I very close future chapter. :K Lol. Nice and disgusting.:) Enjoy your flies, Mello! I already said I'd use Over and Over, remember?!?!! GAWD! Yeah, I might. ;) I don't see how Monsoon fits into the chapters right now, though. 0.o  
**

**LadyWillowTree- =3 Everyone does (is it does or do? Damn grammar!) need a Pookie, and mine's home!:D 0.o okay... Keep yelling at Kristin in your reviews..... Have fun with that, Lea. lol. jk. 0.0 Well my author powers saw it fit! He will be being much nice, actually after the huge plot twist I can't wait to write comes. It makes me feel like a masochist, wanting such a bad thing to happen! =K GRR!!! Frick yes! I will, though I have never even SEEN your brother, let alone talked to him. Thats a good thing to say about your brother. Make me think he's weird and not want to meet him. lol. No. But I'm pretty sure I'd scare him. Wouldn't I? :) okie-dokie artachokie.:D Blaflarg!  
**

**Ebony Daggers-Apparently it would seem so. 0.o It makes me happy too. I wrote like... 5 separate chapters trying to figure out how to develop MelloxRen and I just got too angry and gave up. Now I am much happier and calmer.:D Thank you oh-so much! I was meaning to use some Evanescence. I love those bands (I don't know many skillet songs, though. Any particular songs from any of them?) I will absolutely use them. Yeah, I love Mello. Its part of the reason it took me so long to give up the idea of MelloxRen and got so mad when I couldn't write it. He will be getting very nice (in his own way) in like..... 2 chapters. :( I am sorry its painful. Aww! Thanks! That means a lot. And here I thought it wasn't very convincing and descriptive. 0.o I guess I'm a bigger pessimist than I thought. I am glad you enjoy my story.:)**

**He he! I have constant reviewers! I feel special. I will be updating at least 2 times a week, but will let you know if for ANY reason the updates are/will be late. The reasons will be on my profile, at the very top in **_Italics _Underlined **and Boldfaced!:D WHOO! So, uhm....check it out when you can. Tis not mandatory.**

**You know what? I love how my reviewers put up with my stupidness! As do my friends.(Kristin and Lea.) LOOK INTO MY EYES AND ITS EASY TO SEE 1 AND 1 MAKE 2 AND 2 AND 1 MAKE 3! 0.o sorry. more Tenacious D. 0.o I don't own that song, either. Its Tribute by Tenacious D.  
**

** I don't own Death Note, Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol, or It's Been A While by Staind. I also do not own Cheesy Poofs. Cartman (South Park) does.:) I do own my OC Ren.  
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We didn't stay like that for long. My stomach is very persistent, because it began to beckon for food in a matter of minutes. Matt laughed and pulled back.

"Want some breakfast-lunch shit?"

"Oh yes. Breakfast-lunch shit sounds lovely, thank you." I laughed and Matt laughed along with me and my stupidity. We walked down to the cafeteria, talking and laughing. A bunch of people were walking back to their dorms, being done breakfast-lunch shit. It was a Saturday, so everyone was giving us questioning looks as if to say "Where the fuck are YOU TWO going?!", but with their eyes. I stopped dead.

"Are you okay?" Matt said, looking at me like I was crazy or something. And maybe I am.

'What if they aren't serving breakfast anymore?"

"Then they are serving lunch. Their breakfast isn't very good anyway, if that's what your worried about." He chuckled and I hit his shoulder.

"Matt! Be serious! What if there is no food?"

"Then you'll just have to make due with Mello's chocolate and my cheesy poofs." I glared at him.

"THAT WAS AS SERIOUS AS I CAN GET RIGHT NOW!" I sighed and continued walking. When Matt didn't walk I turned around.

"What!?!?!" I yelled at him, earning MORE stares from other innocent people who simply wanted to pass by.

"Well, if they aren't serving food, I ain't going." I shook my head and grabbed his hand, dragging him violently down the halls. Matt let out a little chuckle.

"What now?!?!?"

"You're holding my hand."He said flatly. I stopped and my face grew a light shade of pink. I began stuttering.

"W-well. Th-that's because.... YOU! YOU! Y-you wouldn't come and g-get breakfast..... lunch... I mean!" Matt began laughing hysterically.

"I was only messing with you." He said, sighing as he began walking again, a small smile on his face. I had a shocked and angry look on my face, glued to the spot where I stood now. He turned around and cocked his head to the side. I rolled my eyes. This was beginning to become fairly annoying. We stood there for quite some time. About 3 minutes maybe. It was enough time for some people to stop a couple of feet away and become silent observers. After awhile, Matt became impatient. He needs to not hang out with Mell so much. He walked up to me and grabbed my shoulders, bending down a bit too look at me a bit sternly, if Matt can be stern.

"I thought you were hungry, Ren." I glared at him, but he only smiled.

"Are we going to go now?" I still didn't answer. He just sighed.

"I am too lazy for this." He grabbed me and picked me up, walking off with me slung over his shoulder. Screw pink, my face was red!

"WHAT!?!?! What the fuck, Matt!"

"Well, the food will be gone soon. I thought you were hungry. I know I am!"

"I can move!"

"You weren't!" Damn. Matt can make good points and reasons for his actions. I pouted, looking for a comeback, but gave up when I came up with nothing. Eventually we reached the cafeteria, but he still didn't put me down until we reached the counter to pick up the food, which earned looks of concern, fear, shock, anger and basically everything else from the ladies working behind the counter. Matt just smiled and put me down, chuckling.

"Do you have any food left?" The lunch lady pulled a fake smile onto her face.

"No, sweetie. But if you and your girlfriend come back later at dinner time, acting PROPERLY, you can get dinner." Girlfriend? Her smile grew more bitter with each word after "sweetie".

"Uh, I don't mean to be annoying or rude, but she hasn't eaten in 2 days now. She really needs something to eat." Matt faked a worried look with a hint of pleading. She sighed.

"Fine, but next time, no fooling around and maybe you'll get here in time! Next time you're late, you won't be fed until dinner!" Matt smiled and acted very politely.

"Yes ma'am. We understand completely. Thank you so much." The other lunch ladies just stared at us for a minute, then ran off to help find stuff to feed us with. Matt started chuckling.

"What a BITCH!" He said. I started laughing, too.

"Yeah! What's her problem?"

"Probably has a stick up her ass." I smiled and began laughing harder as the woman came back in, looking at us oddly.

"Hurry up and get back to your dorms with this. You can't eat it here." Matt nodded and we walked out, chuckling until we were out of earshot. Then we burst out laughing.

"HOLY SHIT, SHE LOOKS CONSTIPATED!" Matt laughed.

"Yeah. She needs a holy shit! But there wouldn't be anything "holy" about it!" We were being really loud.

"Maybe we should bring this back to the dorm. I think we might get in trouble just sitting here making fun of lunch ladies all day with food in our hands."

"Eh, I don't wanna eat in the dorm. Wanna go outside?" I looked at him oddly.

"What difference does it make?"

"Well, our dorm smells like chocolate and lord knows what else , and Mello's there...."

"Yeah, lets go outside." Matt started laughing, and so did I. It was so easy to be around Matt. Everything was easy with him there. Life, happiness, anything you can think of. We walked outside to a tree off by the swings where a few children played on and began getting situated.

"So, why here?"

"I guess 'cause it has a lot of shade. The kids are fun to watch."

"You're making this all up as you go along, aren't you?"

".... Yeah. Pretty much." Me admitted, rubbing his neck with an awkward smile. I just laughed and we started eating. French fries, chicken nuggets, and soda. We might as well have gone to MC Donald's or something. But honestly, I didn't mind. I was happy. It was peaceful, happy, and calm here, under the tree, with Matt. The sun was high up in the sky, around the point of noon. It reminded me of one of my favorite songs, so I pulled out my ever-present IPod and began singing.

_"W__e'll do it all  
Everything  
On our own._

_We don't need  
Anything  
Or anyone._

_If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me  
and just forget the world?_"

I stopped singing, realizing once again, I wasn't alone. My face turned read once again. Damn blood, rushing to my face constantly. Matt just smiled at me and leaned back against the tree, relaxing. I did the same, leaning against the tree right next to him. I let the music continue to play in my ear.

_I don't quite know  
How to say  
How I feel_

_Those three words  
Are said too much  
They're not enough._

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_**"It's been a while since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do. It's been a while, but all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you****." It's Been A While by Staind  
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_Well. That chapter made me.... uhm.... IDK! It made me feel very neutral. 0.o I suppose. How about you? How do you feel about my chapter/chapters?!?!? Review and I will be no longer neutral! I will be happy! =3 Happiness=updates! Ima go now. Bye!:)  
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	8. Kiss

**I don't think I have any important note at the moment. 0.0 Odd, isn't it?  
**

**Kishi Senmatsu- HAHAHAHA! That has nothing to do with Silent Hill! If I were you, I would save the freaking out for when you start hearing sirens. lol. Good, and I wouldn't be surprised if someone jumped into your window. Bla-la-la-la-la-la-la? I'd rather not, Mello.0.o Rape and pedophile, much? Yeah, I think he is on a permanent period or something.0.o Aww, why thank you! I actually answered all but one of these the day I posted it. I'm watching that Bleach movie... yeah..... I realized about 20 minutes into it, that I've sen it before....(I wasn't paying attention before..) UHM, THERE WERE A LOT OF WORDS IN THAT CHAPTER! There is no pleasing you, so I'm done. JUST GO MASTICATE! HAHA! She was laying on the floor too long. The commercial just came on. =3 It has caused her severe injuries. Eww, that slut I hate just came on, so I'ma end the review reply.0.o TOSHIRO!!!!!:D  
**

**LadyWillowTree- Lea won't have to wait very long.:) I am writing it right after I posted it. (Waiting for FullMetal Alchemist to come on.0.o) Lol. I scare small children. My little buddy (I had to have for RES, that is.. ) wouldn't talk to me. 0.o I told him he was awesome and offered him a fist bump, but he just looked at me like I said I was going to tie him to a rope and throw him into pudding full of orangutans. T_T Kk. Me and Pookie were playing Call Of Duty while I wrote these replies! HAHA! DIE! 0.0 bie bie! pie pie!**

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0- Omg! Vacation? Awesome! I hope you had fun, but I wouldn't be able to live with out Internet. My dad took us camping, and every time we went to Wal-Mart, I went on the Internet with the cell phone. I am happy to hear that. I shalst try my hardest! 0.0  
**

**Ebony Daggers-Yay! Yeah. lol. Alright, I'm going to check those right now. Thank you. Any specific songs for Evanescence or Linkin Park? I can't really think of any besides My December. 0.o Thank you, and I will try my hardest. The lunch lady never returns, much to every ones "Dismay".:D  
**

**I don't own Death Note, Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol, or It's Been A While by Staind. I do own my OC Ren.  
**

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**The children screamed behind us, swinging on the swings with cries ranging from "Higher! Higher!" to "I'm scared!". I leaned my head upwards and shut my eyes, letting the sunlight that shined through the tree branches and leaves hit my face. I opened my eyes to the feeling on the tree shaking, finding Matt halfway up it.

"What are you doing?"

"I am a ninja."

"...."

".... Are you jealous????~"

"NO!" He looked down at me, very happy with what he was doing and the reaction he got with it. Once he was safely up the tree, he reached his hand down.

"Oh, hell no."

"Come on! It's so cool up here! I can see everything!"

"N.O." He glared down at me.

"Then I will have to use my NINJA ABILITIES.'"

"Ninja what now?!?!" Matt grabbed his goggles off from his forehead and put them over his eyes. He then hung from a low tree branch by his legs, holding himself up with his knees. He hung upside down, right in front of me and grabbed my hand, swinging himself up onto the tree branch and I came along unwillingly.. We literally flung up onto the branch.

"What was that-"Matt pouted slightly.

"What?" He pouted even more and looked at the ground below.

"Is this the real reason we were eating here, Mr. Ninja Abilities?" He nodded in a very childish manner, still pouting.

"Then what's the reason for being in the tree?" He turned away.

"Are you going to talk." He turned back to me, then looked down again.

"Well, I kinda like the heights. It's like when you're up here, all the bad stuff and everything that confuses me just suddenly becomes clear." I looked up towards the sun while I said it, a little embarrassed with how deep it was. He looked off into space again.

"This wasn't the only reason I brought you here." What was he beating around the bush for? He adjusted on the branch, straddling it and leaning forward with his hands pressed down in front of him.

"What?" He paused, thinking for a minute. Then he leaned forward and kissed me. It was a soft kiss, my first kiss. Most likely Matt's first as well, and it lasted about 30 seconds. Or until a child saw us.

"AHHH!!!! HE'S EATING HER FACE!"

"HE MUST BE A ZOMBIE!" Another child yelled, causing us to pull back.

"RUN AWAY!!!!" The kids ran off screaming to god knows where, leaving me and Matt blushing like crazy. Matt coughed and began to move. I started giggling, then flat out laughing, as did Matt right after me.

"I... uh.. haha...*cough* Think Mello might kinda w-wonder where we are, or me at least." I laughed and nodded in agreement. He slid down the tree, leaving me sitting there. I hadn't noticed before, but I was kinda high up.

"You coming, or will you sit there all day?"

"Uhm.... I. I kinda ..... Can't." He looked puzzled and then his eyes got wide.

"Oh. OH! Uh.. Here. Slide down, and I'll catch you." He looked up, ready to catch me but I was worried and scare shit less.

"Come on, you wont get hurt. I promise." I looked around once more and started sliding down very slowly. Matt stood there with his arms, while I took my time. He probably kept his arms out because I would freak out if he wasn't ready to catch me. He was right. I took the final slide and fell into his arms. He put me down right after and we walked back to the dorm quickly and silently laughing.

We stopped right outside of the door, an air of tension hitting us as soon as we reached the mumbled something, then chuckled to himself. I walked in first, figuring Matt would get the worst of Mello's anger anyway. Then again, Mello doesn't particularly like me..

"Where were you? I walked by the cafeteria, but you weren't there. Then, a bunch of little kids came running past me screaming about some zombie eating a girl...." We stifled a laugh and continued walking towards the bed and beanbag chair, walking right by Mello.

"Hello?!"

"Huh?" We both said simultaneously.

"Where. Have. You. Been?"

"Out eating."

"Out eating where?"

"Outside by the swings. We weren't aloud to eat in the cafeteria." I replied.

"Well, why outside? Why not eat in here?"

"Eh. I didn't want to walk..." Matt grunted as he plopped into his big-ass bean bag chair, putting Halo 3 into the X-Box 360 and signing in. He looked over at me and patted the spot next to him, holding a spare controller, pouting again.

"UGH!" Mello stomped over to his desk where he began studying, and I giggled and walked over to Matt, eager to play some video games with him. I died a lot. We got booted about.... 5 times for my accidental "friendly fire" and "team killing." I betrayed a ton of people, including Matt, but he just laughed whenever I did. I killed myself a lot, too. It didn't bother me that I sucked, and apparently Matt was fine with this as well. We stayed up all night playing video games. I was just happy being around him. I loved being around Matt.

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**_"I have loved you from the start. Oh. But hold your breath because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you, over again. Don't make me change my mind or I won't live to see another day. _**_**" Fall For You by Secondhand Serenade  
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_Hehe. AWKWARD. I had trouble writing the stuff, so tell me what I need to improve. Was anyone out of character? Like possibly Matt? (Matt can tell me if I potrey him wrong.) It felt odd how this thing flowed, so tell me if you feel so too.  
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	9. Nightmares

**I has question. If you have time, would you please maybe go read the poem I wrote? It's posted and..... yeah. Please, I am really proud of it and I want some feedback on it.:) I promise, its better than this chapter.-_- Thankies! I didn't really have anything to write, so I am sorry that this chapter is seriously worthless and full of filler grossness. I want sooo bad to post the next chapter before this, but I can't. So I'ma make this chapter suck less, if I can. Again I am sorry. The next chapter shouldn't take long to write, and I wanna post it quickly to make up for the shittyness of this chapter.**

**I APOLOGIZE! My characters name.... if anyone reads Fruits Basket/Furuba, you know. Akito's mom..... Her name is Ren, and it took me a while to actually realize this, so I apologize. But that isn't where I got it, so there. I am apologizing. Sorry.:(  
**

**Kishi Senmatsu- Haha. Not a very big failure.;) Nice. Lance gave me a headache. He was screaming the whole time, trying to be funny but only succeeding in PISSING ME OFF! ARGH! Uhm. Idk. What episode was it? Was it the Toshiro movie thing that revolved around him?  
**

**LadyWillowTree- Thanks to Lea for being my first reviewer this time.:) Yeah, stupid small children. PFFT!0.0 Eh, I AM a pessimist. ;) Thankies!=3 Neither can I honestly, cuz I aint very sure how this will end. lol.  
**

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0- Yeah, it was different. I told you I wanted to kill the drama. No one told me either! I'm glad you liked it.:)  
**

**Ebony Daggers- Haha. I am glad everyone liked the kiss, cause it was awkward as all hell for me to write. :o I don't think I have the capability to write something like that, though it would be interesting. I'll see about that.;)  
**

**I don't own Death Note. I do own my OC Ren.  
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_Everything was blurry. I saw red. Lots of red. Almost everything I saw was red, with few exceptions. I turned to the left and saw something move._

_"Mom." I whispered. It moved a bit more. I ran over to it._

_"What happened." I heard laughter coming form the kitchen and turned to look._

_"Hello?" A large, dark figure walked out of the doorway in black clothes stained with blood, his face twisted maniacally from the laughter he was holding back. I fell backwards into a puddle of blood as he stepped forwards, mumbling stuff to himself._

_"You all deserve it....... You deserve nothing more....." He began to laugh as he swung his arm back, revealing a glistening knife covered in the red sticky substance. I slid backwards, crying as the dark figure advanced much faster than I could crawl backwards.  
_

_"No..... No... This isn't happening. NO! NO! HELP!!!!"  
_

My eyes flew open as I frantically searched my surrounding, breathing heavily, tears running down my cheeks. I had fallen asleep playing video games, using Matt's chest as a pillow. A very damp pillow. He was already awake, giving me a concerned look.

"You okay?" I forced a smile. It wasn't very convincing, considering I had tears streaming down my cheeks.

"Yeah, I'm fine. It was nothing, just a dream."

"Was it a nightmare? You were whispering something about your mom and kept saying no....." I yawned and stretched out, laying my head on him again.

"I'm still tired. Wake me up soon for breakfast, mk?" I changed the subject. Matt worries too much about me. He brushed the hair out of my face and smiled at me.

"Okay. Sweet dreams." Mello made a gagging noise from across the room, and I laughed as I drifted off to sleep.

_"Where are we?"_

_"A place to start fresh." The small child pondered on what the old man had said. The man began to walk up to the doors, and the child skipped after him, thinking about how he looked a bit like Santa Claus. They walked into a large foyer, and she gasped. It was simply amazing. There were multiple hallways branching outwards and a main office dead ahead. The man lead her in to great the caretaker. She began looking about, letting her attention drift.  
_

_"Hey......hey......HEY!!!!!"_

"WHAAA?!?!??!" I woke up to what I thought were convulsions, but turned out to be Matt shaking me.

"If you don't wake up and change now, we'll miss breakfast.... AGAIN! And I am NOT dealing with that...... whatever that was!" I just laughed.

"Yeah, yeah. Okay, I'm up, see? UP!" I stood up and started jumping, singing.

"UP! UP! UP! I. AM. UP!" Matt picked me up and shoved me into the closet full of clothes, mumbling.

"I should have never given you Amp....." He sighed and shut the door, leaving me in the closet. Yeah, I was in the closet. Make your jokes and laugh. I picked out my outfit for the day (An iron maiden shirt, ripped-to-shreds skinny jeans, and some aviators, along with my customary hi-top converse or multiple colors) and walked into the bathroom to get showered and dresses.

After my shower, I got dressed and combed my hair, then stopped to sniff it. I sniffed it again. It smelt odd. I walked over to the shower and pulled out the only two bottles of shampoo. Matt and Mello's. Matt's Ax and Mello's Herbal Essence. I stopped and sniffed Mello's shampoo, which smelled nothing like my hair, unfortunately. I sighed. Even though I would smell like Mello, it's still better than smelling like Ax. I paused and took a deep breath before opening Matt's shampoo. I sniffed it to find out I used his. I sighed and exited the bathroom. Matt grabbed me and sniffed my hair.

"You know, Ax only attracts girls, not boys. Are you trying to tell me something?" He was grinning, and I shoved him away.

"NO! I don't have any shampoo, and it's better than smelling like.... like MELLO!" I pointed dramatically across the room to the blond that was frozen, mid bent down to pick up his chocolate bar that he must have dropped.

"WHAAAA?!??!?!" Mello exclaimed, angry.

"We better leave......" I said, seeing that Mello was already fuming. I grabbed Matt and we ran out of the room, with Mello following. Shit, I forgot he has to eat breakfast too. He caught up and glared at me while we walked. I didn't look back once.

We grabbed our breakfast, the lunch lady that served us last time glared at us, so me and Matt smiled and waved to her politely. We sat down at a table and began eating.

"Never again are you having anything that could have the slightest effect of making you hyper." Mello growled. I just rolled my eyes and leaned across he table towards Matt, excited.

"What are we doing today?" Matt paused and began rubbing him temples, deep in thought.

"..... What are you doing?" Mello looked at him like he was crazy.

"Thinking motion. This is how I think."

"Well, Mr. Thinker, what are we doing today?"

"... VIDEO GAMES!!!!" I glared at him and he stood up triumphantly.

"We will play video games!" He nodded his head and began mumbling stuff to himself, something about killing Andrew Ryan once and for all. I stood up, a thought crossing my mind.

"Lets go visit L!" I said this a little too loud, because the whole lunch room stopped talking and stared at me. I slowly sat back down and repeated myself quieter.

"We..... can't...." Matt said, looking away.

"Why the hell not?" I demanded. He just put his head down on the table. Mello sighed.

"We didn't wanna tell you, cause we thought you'd be upset. He's already left to work on the Kira investigation." My head dropped a little. Matt looked up at me, sadness painting his face like a canvas.

"S.....Sorry." I looked up, a little surprised at Mello apologizing to me.

"No, it's fine. You couldn't do anything about it and neither could I."

"... You okay?" Matt was leaning against the table, with his head in his hand and his head sideways. I smiled.

"Yeah, fine. I think I'll take you up on that offer of playing video games." He smiled and Mello sighed.

"Come on, Mello! We JUST bought a new controller, so you can play too!" I got up and smiled in front of him.

"Yippie." I just rolled my eyes and dragged him out of the cafeteria.

We spent the rest of the day playing on the X-Box. Even Mello played, but when he died the 7th time, he broke the new controller by throwing it on the ground and stomping on it. This was how most days were now. After classes, we would go out sometimes for fast food, the occasional restaurant, and to buy Mello some chocolate and Matt some video games. Things didn't really change much now that L was gone. It was almost like he was never here.

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**Like I said, I hate this chapter. I hate it so much, I didn't even give it a song. But review if you wish. Tell me how much you hate me being a jerk and posting filler-y shit.:(  
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	10. Unknown Destinations

Apparently according to Kristin, the last chapter didn't suck!:) Don't be mad or upset if you didn't review the last chapter. I'm suprise Kristin did. I never even told her I posted it. I LOVE/HATE THIS CHAPTER! That is all.

**Kishi Senmatsu- Yeah, I kinda did.0.o Ugh. I WILL! Idk which chapter it was though. There goes a good chunk of my life (If you could call it that)GONE! Poof. Not a clue.0.o XD I just laughed so hard I felt like I was gunna puke. It's cuz I love him with all my heart.-_- HE'S ANNOYING THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME!!! ARRRGGGG!!!!!!:K Haha. Nerd. Haha. Well, he just pisses me off, and you know that when I'm pissed, I rant. A lot.-_- Sorry. Thanks, cuz I hate that chapter. WHEWT!!! That'll be my second.:) I'll send you what she looks like. I know I wrote it. I just have to find where. lol.  
**

**Well, I don't own Death Note or The Cure by Sage Francis. I do own my OC Ren.  
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Time went on. Mello, Matt and I hung out all the time. Hours turned into days, day into months, and months into a years. Eventually, time grew older, and so did the kids at Whammy's. Everything went on. Life continues, with or without a person there, whether we accept it or not. But how long will a person be gone before we forget they ever existed? And how long till they eventually leave for good?

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Rain. Hitting my window in repetitive, off beat patterns. Painting the world and sky in gray, the prefect backdrop to a day with nothing special about it. A dull day. The rain matched the people hiding indoors from it. Everyone was inside for classes. Everyone including me, Mello, and Matt. I was staring out the window when the teacher called my name.

"Ren!"

"What?" I blinked furiously, adjusting my vision from the bleak outside world back to the bright classroom and our yellow clad teacher. Some children snickered, some rolled their eyes. Mello and Matt looked at me, faces worried a bit, frowning.

"Why don't you tell the class what the answer to problem 2 is?" I looked up at the board.

"Four p to the fourth power times q to the third." She looked up, at her paper, then back at me.

"Correct." She said as she looked away. I rolled my eyes and stared out the again, folding my arms on my desk. Classes dragged on and on. Once it ended, Matt waited up for me with Mello.

"What was that back there?"

"What?"

"You didn't use your scrap paper or anything. Why don't you always answer the questions like that? Your ranking would be higher!"

"Cause there's no point in it. It's not like I'll surpass L, and I could never surpass you or Mello. Especially not-"

"Near?" Mello looked angry. He had his arms folded and was glaring at the albino looking child.

"No, I was gonna say you, Mello." He turned to me, a little taken aback by my comment.

"Oh. Never mind, then." We headed back to the dorm. We had to go outside at one point. Mello and Matt ran to the other building, but I walked, twirling in the rain. It dropped and slid down my face like tears.

"COME ON!" Mello yelled from the doorway. I turned and ran, slipping a bit from time to time, even in the hallways. When we got inside, we began playing video games. At about 6:10 P.M, Roger came in with a somber expression.

"Mello, I need to see you in my office." Mello got up and walked out.

"I'll..... be right back..." He said and he exited. I looked over at Matt, a tad bit worried. Had someone else surpasses Mello? What would he do then? Matt just went back to the video game. We sat there for about 30 minutes till Mello barged back in.

"Get out." He barked at me.

"Why? What hap-"

"NOW!" I scrambled to get onto my feet and left as Mello slammed the door behind me. I heard a bit of yelling muffled by the door, some slams, and stuff being moved and opened. Mello stormed out and looked down at me, then back to Matt.

"You have 30 minutes." He walked away and I ran in to see what had happened.

"What was that?" Matt was disconnecting cords to his mass amount of video games and putting them into a big suitcase very carefully.

"Something bad has happened." I sat down next to him.

"Why are you packing your stuff up?" He zipped up the bag and ran over to the closet, flinging stuff randomly into another suitcase.

"I have to go with Mello. Somewhere far away."

"Where are you going that's so far away?"

"I.... I don't know." I grabbed a bag and started packing my things.

"You can't come."

"Why the hell not!?" He looked away, pain evident on his face.

"It's too dangerous for you. I won't risk your life with this." I threw my stuff down and walked over to him.

"I don't care. I don't even know what's going on. What the hell happened?" He looked up at me, tears building in his eyes a bit.

"L..... Died." I took a step backwards. All I could do is whisper "No."

"We are going to take up the case and I don't want the same to happen to you." I furiously shook my head, causing tears to fly.

"No. I am coming with you. You can't leave me here!" Matt stood up and held my head in his hands.

"I don't want to. You don't know how hard this is for me. I have no options at this point." Tears were flowing down my cheeks and puddling up in his hands.

"Believe me. If I had any say in this, you'd be by my side through all of this."

"You CAN have a say! Mello doesn't control your life!" He looked away and went back to packing.

"Please." I neeled down in front of him, drying my tears.

"Please." I grabbed his hands, forcing him to look up at me.

"Don't do this to me." He cupped my face in his hands and kissed me.

"..... Pack your things quickly." I grabbed my things and threw them into the suitcase. We walked down the halls and outside to get to the other side of the orphanage we might never see again. It now had become clear why today had such a bleak outlook from the begging. L's death was not only mourned by those that idolized and loved him. It was mourned by the whole world. We ran to the outside and met Mello, who was waiting with a cab. He looked to me.

"What's she doing here? I thought I told you you were to leave her here."

"I can't do that..." Matt looked away.

"Fuck it, we don't have much time." He snatched the bags from us and flung them into the back of the cab. Matt and I walked towards it and got in. Mello sat in the front.

"Where to?"

"The nearest airport." I sat and looked out the window at the mournful sky, wishing life wasn't always like this. All the killing and war. People dieing for what they believe. Unjust solutions for unjust actions, covered by the cloak of morality and integrity. Tears started forming in the puts of my eyes. I looked to Matt, who was crying as well. I hugged him. For we were not crying alone. The whole world was crying with us.

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_**"Life is just a lie with an "f" in it and death is definite. But after I scratched the surface I never saw the calm before the storm act so nervous." The Cure by Sage Francis**_

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**I wanted to write this really bad. I almost stayed up all night, but my mom kicked my mom off at 12:40. ALMOST 1:00!!!!:( I almost cried while writing it. But then again, I am weird. So tell me if I'm just stupid for almost crying over this. Reviews are greatly appreicated! Thanks for reading!:) I wanted to post this really bad, so I am sorry if the song doesn't make sense, but I love this song and it's soooo sad!!! Any good songs for the next chapter??? *Wink wink, hint hint!*  
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	11. Flight Plans

**Well, it seems no one "hated" chapter 9. 0.o I really REALLY loved the last chapter, so I am nervous about writing this one and following up with the last one. I will answer both chapter reviews, cause I have nothing better to do, and I think that I should since I posted it too fast anyway.:P ITS SNOWING!!!!! AGAIN!!!.....:(  
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**Chapter 9 (Nightmares) Reviews!=3  
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**Ebony Dagger-** Thanks. Ha ha. She is crazy and weird. I just kinda realized that the name didn't actually belong to me as much as I had hoped. 0.o I'm glad. No one really hated that chapter. I hated writing it, though.:P Yeahs. It is important to do that, even if it is through writing fillers.:)

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0-**Thanks! I needed to hear that.=3 I love you guys too! (In the non-creepy way.0.o)

**LadyWillowTree-**Yeah, but I was hoping the next chapter made up for it. I took a whole day and just tried to write that amazingly. So do me and Kristin! WE ISH ALL COORDINATED HAIR PEOPLE!!!:D Kewl! 0.o That sounds bad, Lea........

Well. Thats all of em. ONWARD TO THE REVIEWS FOR CHAPTER 10!!!!:D

**Kishi Senmatsu- Well, I sure as hell HOPE you reviewed it. Otherwise, this is very weird.0.o *in british accent* I DON'T WANT TO GO INTO DETAIL!!!! She didn't think it was their last kiss. If you want an explanation, here the fuck it is! *He kissed me softly on the lips and retracted almost instantly.* Happy? I don't think laughing is yelling.0.o I was being sarcastic, there IS a difference. Monsoon would've been helpful earlier!!!!:P**

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0-I'm sorry.:( I didn't really want to make you guys cry! If it helps, my allergies are acting up right now and my eyes are watering. 0.o Haha. I'm always weird. I KNOW, RIGHT?!?! Damn physiologists. -_- Ha ha. I rant a lot too. Just ask.... well. Ask anyone I converse with! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I loved writing it too, but didn't like how little detail was in the end. 0.o**

**LadyWillowTree-Have fun crawling into a coron (Whatever the fuck THAT is.0.o) lol. No, I'm sorry. At least you didn't cry. (Or, I hope I didn't make you cry.:() RIP L! (L's staring at me and yelling I'M NOT DEAD, DAMMIT!)**

**Tsori-Iikagen-Aww, I'm sorry.:( Well, I'm glad it was good.:) We hash to be strong.=[ I sure hope that chapter doesn't think it sucks, or it can just go crawl in a corner and DIE because I worked hard on it!:( I will try! Thank you for the review!:)****  
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**Well, I don't own Death Note or Calling Old Friends by Defiance, Ohio. I do own my OC Ren, who I am glad to hear isn't a freaking psychopath.:) Anyway, enjoy chapter 11!! Whewt!  
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Buildings and asphalt. People without faces or identities as far as I'm concerned, flying off into the distance along with the orphanage filled with all too familiar faces. Never had I ever been this far outside of the only place I ever could truly call my home. They were all speeding away in the opposite direction, as if they were running from the path I was traveling down. As I said goodbye to Whammy's (though it was long gone, off in the far distance with the others) and said goodbye to England, for fear I would never even cross the waves that gently lap it's shores. I might never even travel back here again and I really had no say in the matter. Neither did Matt, really. He only had partial control of the fact that I was going down a path with a destination Mello didn't even foresee. We pulled into the airport parking lot and left into the harsh outside world. The rain stung our exposed flesh as we walked into the building. We were an odd group. Mello, a blond guy with as big a scowl he could muster plastered on his face, Matt, a boy hugging me with a shirt that was half see through and sad eyes covered by tinted goggles peering down at the one he cared for most, and me, a petite amber haired girl crying into Matt's chest while he hugged me and rubbed my hair in an attempt to sooth my muffled sobs. The woman looked at us skeptically.

"Where to?"

"The fastest way to America." I looked up a bit, just enough to look at Matt.

"America?" I whispered. He just leaned down and kissed my forehead softly, whispering.

"It's alright. You'll be okay, I promise." He looked into my eyes and smiled.

"Okay. Will that be first class of coach?"

"Do we really look like we can afford first class?!" She looked away and handed him the tickets without making eye contact. He snatched them and slammed the money on the counter. We walked to get ready to get on the plane.

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The dark clouds ahead of us foreshadowing the events in the future. As if they were hinting that there was no turning back, and the path ahead of us was doomed from the moment we walked it. I fell asleep on the plane, even if we were flying coach. No one dared sit next to us. Mello wore a constant scowl on his face, glaring at the clouds and everything he could lay his eyes upon. We were on this pane, toward a destination that was still unknown to me other than the fact it was in America. I wonder if even Matt knows where we are heading? I shouldn't ask, for fear of Mello getting pissed, since he IS sitting right next to me. I began wondering of what could have happened to L. How did he die? Did someone kill him? If someone killed him, I would... Tears began forming in the pits of my eyes, and I blinked to allow them to flow down my cheeks. Matt felt the tears soaking through his thin white and black striped shirt and looked down to me.

"Everything is alright. We'll be okay. I promise."

"You know what the last thing I ever said to L was?" He looked down at me, concerned.

" Fuck this. I yelled that at him and got mad because of something he had no real say over. Maybe if he didn't have me to worry about, he would have payed more attention and he'd still be alive." My tears ran down my face leaving red marks to mark the place they once drowned. My sobs were attracting attention from people nearby. Eventually, while Matt was trying to calm me, an attendant came over. Matt kissed me, not noticing her.

"That could never be the case."She coughed and looked over to me.

"Is everything alright here?" I looked up from Matt's shirt. She was wearing all red, even red lipstick, with a white collared shirt under it and red heel with a red skirt. Her eyes were well made up, but the fake smile the attendants usually plaster on was gone. She was frowning and looking at Matt as if he were the culprit.

"It's nothing, really. Thank you for the concern, but I have it handled, ma'am." She dismissed what Matt said, glaring partially at him, and returned to look at me with worry on her face.

"Are you sure you're okay?" The fact that she disregarded Matt so simply and without caring made me angry. I looked up to glare at her.

"Leave." She blinked a few times.

"E-Excuse me?"

"L.E.A.V.E.......... Leave!"

"But, you're-"

"He has it covered. Did you not hear him?"

"Ah....." Matt looked at her.

"It seems to me you're doing more harm than good. I would appreciate it if you would leave before you do more damage." She stood there with her mouth open, ajar.

"Oh, but you can come back to bring me some peanuts. How about you? You want some peanuts, Ren?" I snickered.

"Sure?"

"Now go fetch us some peanuts, we are quite hungry!" She just glared at Matt and walked away, returning to bring us our peanuts within a few minutes. Once she did, Matt quickly opened his, grabbed a peanut, and threw it at the back of her head. She turned around quickly and Matt acted as if he didn't notice, while I snickered. She stomped off leaving us there snickering. I looked up at Matt, who was still snickering to himself; obviously proud of what he did. I tapped him on the shoulder. He looked down and his smile faded when he saw my frown.

"I'm nervous. How long of a flight is it?" He smirked a little, and I mentally sighed at how childish that sounded.

"About an hour or two. We'll be fine." I looked up at his, still a bit unsure. One or two hours is plenty of time for something to go wrong.

"Trust me. If you just fall asleep, it'll be over soon enough." He kissed my forehead softly and I laid my head on his chest, using it like a pillow. Within a matter of minutes, when I was about to fall asleep, we hit turbulence. I jolted up and began panting heavily.

"What's wrong? It was just a bit of turbulence." I sighed. People stared, and I must have looked crazy to them. I shook my head and put my head down again.

"This time, I will fall asleep." I whispered to myself. Matt just chuckled and I drifted to sleep softly with the sound of the plane soaring softly.

* * *

**_"Those roads that stretch ahead of us, the roads that led us here; singing traditional renditions of the songs we sang last year. And though these times have made us stronger, the outcome's no more clear._**_**" Calling Old Friends by Defiance, Ohio  
**_

* * *

**I wrote part of this at school on the stickies ap. lol.:) See? See what I do for you guys?! I write at school which earns me odd looks from people! I had to make the Stickie almost the size of the screen. :p I was like HOLY SHIZ! BIG ASS STICKIE NOTE! I decided to ask a question, to see if you guys actually read this shit I post down here. 0.o Okay, so if you had a million dollars, but you could only spend them on one thing, and it has to be very odd or stupid. 0.o What would you buy? I think I'd buy a stickie note the size of my house.:)  
**


	12. A New Location

I can not wait to write the last two chapters! I am getting so excited! EEP!. But we aren't that close, so off to the next chapter.:) I am curious to know. Who voted on the poll on my page? It wasn't mandatory. I just kinda had a bit of writers block and needed some confirmation. So yeah..... Okay, on to the replies and stuff.

**Kishi Senmatsu- Why thank you!=3 I hoped you did.:) Only 2 so far. 0.o It depresses me, but must be a bit well deserved. =/ Good idea! I would help you! Can I change mine? I would get Destrey his nipple extension. ;) Seriously.:) I would! I wanna get those rolls of bubble wrap that have the bubbles the size of your head! They have em! You have to JUMP on them to pop em!:D I WANT MY DAMN REFRIGERATOR BOX!!!!:(:( No one will get me one for X-Mas(X-Man Christmas!)  
**

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0-Dahmn! That sounds crazy! I'd have to help you eat that. *COUGH* Ahem..... Thank you for reading the authors notes. lol.  
**

**LadyWillowTree-Aww! Lea! You always know how to make me happy! Whether it is involuntary or not! =3 You said Dammit! KRISTIN! LEA SAID DAMMIT!=3 Schweetness!:) Aww! I ish sorry! L says nothing, but is giving em a WTF?!?! Look. :D YAY! L's THREE HUNDRED MILLIONTH WTF MOMENT FTW!!!!:D:D:D he ran away, for fear of affection. 0.o I am sorry. When we exchange gifts, I will chain him to a pole or something. 0.o Whoa. Kinky.0.0 MOVING ON!!!! Thank you! Sorry for the shortness and such, but I have to try to crank out a good long chapter in 3 days or less, so.... Yeah. Because after that I will most likely be busy.=/  
**

**Tsori-Iikagen-Ha ha! No, it's okay! I loved this review, because I am a pyro who hates school.;) It makes me smile whenever I read it. =P That's a good idea. Would you mind burning mine down too? Last year there were 3 bomb threats. 0.o I think that would be an improvement.=/ Yeah. I didn't want to go into .... I can't say. 0.o Or them landing in America before the next chapter, so I will try to make this chapter longer to make up for it.:) Haha. Nice. I would probably yell at her too, just like Mello. Though I have never even been on a plane, much less in an airport. 0.o Thank god for movies giving me knowledge on what goes on there!:D**

**Kaaayyytteee-Why thank you.:3 I am very happy to have a new reviewer.:) I hope you continue reading and like my story.:) Thanks for the review!:D  
**

**Well, I don't own Death Note, Hate Me by Blue October or Stained Glass and Marble by Rise Against. I do own my OC, Ren.  
**

**

* * *

**

_I stood on green grass stretching out till it reached the iron gates that held it all in. Behind me, towering over the grass and me, was a large building. Could it be? Am I really at Whammy's? It was all just a dream. Does this mean L is okay? I stood staring at my home, when a figure emerged from the corner of my eyes. The figure grew and grew. I started noticing features. Black hair, white shirt, blue jeans. The person had their hands in the pockets. The figure was about 200 feet away when I noticed the hair was spiked, as if they had been laying in bed for days. My eyes popped open._

_"L!" I began running at the person full speed, as if I intended to tackle them. As I grew closer, I realized it was in fact my L. The L I had thought was dead, gone forever. Right before me. Tears began to form as I sprinted at him. He continued walking at the same pace as he was before, not looking up from his feet. Within seconds he was a mere 10 feet away. I stretched my arms out and reached for him, half bracing for an impact. He continued walking, not changing posture at all. I reached out and hugged L, but he kept walking. He went through me. No. I went through HIM. What's going on?_

_"L." I whispered. He turned to look behind him, slightly agitated. _

_"You left me to die, now you have the same fate." He began walking again. Tears started falling from my eyes._

_"No...NO! I never left you! It can't be my fault! Why.... Why?" He just stopped, not even looking back at me. In a cold voice, he replied._

_"Why do you think I died, anyway? It was all your fault. How could you do this to me? You're the reason I died. Now you have to live with that."_

_I fell to my knees shaking as I cried, whispering his name._

_"Ryuzaki....... Lawliet.... Don't leave me.... not again."_

"Ren? You okay?"

"What?"

"You were mumbling in your sleep again."

"Really?"

"I couldn't understand what you were saying, but you did cry." I whipped my eyes to check. He was right. My mascara had run a bit, and I had classic black tears. I laughed. I cry raven tears for my raven haired dead friend. I shook my head and grabbed my iPod.

"You going to be okay for the rest of the flight? There's only about 30 minutes left, maybe. Then we can go to nowhere." He finished it with a smile and I saw Mello turn his head a bit to glare at him. I chuckled a bit.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Don't worry." I turned my iPod on and put on the shuffle setting and began mumbling song to myself, mouthing the words.

_"I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head  
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed  
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I'm alone  
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home  
There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain  
An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?  
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?  
And will you never try to reach me? It is I that wanted space_

_Hate me today  
Hate me tomorrow  
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you_

_Hate me today  
Hate me tomorrow  
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you_

_Hate me in ways  
Yeah ways hard to swallow  
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you_

_And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave  
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made  
And like a baby boy I never was a man  
Until I saw your blue eyes crying and I held your face in my hand  
And then I fell down yelling "make it go away!"  
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be  
And then she whispered "How can you do this to me?"_

_Hate me today  
Hate me tomorrow  
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you_

_Hate me in ways  
Yeah ways hard to swallow  
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you"_

Time passed quickly. My mind raced with thoughts flying all around, bouncing around my head. When we reached out destination somewhere in America, we left the plane and grabbed our luggage. We exited the airport, like our own dis functional family, and got another cab.

"Where too?"

"Los Angelous." I sighed. At least me and Matt knew where we were now. No more guessing where we were heading. A large city was waiting up the road, on this path we traveled together.

* * *

(Time skip. A few hours.)

Mello checked us into a room at a motel. Two beds, one bathroom, a mini fridge, a television, and a few other things. Cheesy yellow brown wallpaper plastered everywhere, all around, ripped and barely holding itself up. The not so white carpets had stains on them. Three windows, all in desperate need of washing. Red doors with peeling paint. I figured if we got some money soon, I'd clean the place up as well as I could. Mello told us that we should get jobs. Make up for the fact there is one more person to take care of, and that I couldn't be a freeloader or "useless". Mello had one of Rogers credit cards, but I figured when the purchases started coming in on it he'd just cancel it. The first thing in the morning, me and Matt were going to get a cheap car with the credit card and get jobs.

"You should rest up. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow." He smiled at me and I bit my bottom lip.

"I guess so."

"Here." He picked me up and put me down on one of the beds. The light blue comforter crinkled under me as I gazed up at Matt. Mello had already fallen asleep in the other bed. God forbid anyone wake him up right now.

"Where are you sleeping?" He stole a spare pillow from Mello's bed and threw it on the ground.

"There." I crawled to the end of the bed to look at him.

"You can't. That's friggin disgusting."

"I don't really have much of a choice, since Mello took the other bed, now do I?"

"Then sleep here!" He looked at me oddly. I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"I don't mean to be mean but, grow up!" I grabbed the pillow off the ground, whipping it off with my hand and throwing it onto the end of the bed.

"You sleep upside down." He looked at me oddly.

"You really wanna sleep near my feet?" I rolled my eyes and grabbed his arm, tugging him out the door and locking it. We started walking over to the nearest convenience store.

"What are we doing?" I ran off leaving Matt confused standing there in the middle of the store. He ran after me, yelling for me to stop.

"What?" I was browsing the shampoo's and body washes.

"Well, if we're going to get jobs, be have to appeal. Grab the cheapest, best smelling stuff you can find." I grabbed green apple shampoo and conditioner and some green apple body wash. He grabbed Ax body wash and said he'd use it for his hair too. As long as he's fine with it. We paid and left. When we got back, I made Matt wash his feet and put on new socks, and we went to sleep.

* * *

_**"Come warm your hands on hellfire and brimstone. Empty the pockets of the innocent victim bound by fear. We misplace trust in your voice inside these walls convincing us we have no choice." Stained Glass and Marble by Rise Against  
**_

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**I apologize for the fact that this chapter took so long to come out, but I was very busy whilst in New Jersey, so..... Yeah. :( I cranked this out while eating. Both times! Sorry, it has....... FILLER in it. 0.o *Blegh*  
**


	13. Working Class Hero

TT_TT I am so sad. I stayed up past 4:00 am writing this chapter, but I was so tired that I forgot to save it.:( I really.... REALLY didn't want to re-write it. But I did. Then guess what? I DIDN"T SAVE AGAIN!!!!:( ARG! Well, it's done now. ENJOY!~

**Kishi Senmatsu- Absolutely nothing.:) I am proud to say that.=D I know, but I have hd another filer so it's all good.:D AYAAAAHHHH! Nah, I think I'll stop after this chapter.;) Uhm,,, lady?! I reviewed:) HAPPY?!?! Well, IM SORRY!:P Will do, lady~ We should watch all of em in one night!!!!!:D Oh, Kristin~ Saying such things might make me hungrier than I already am~lol. I'm serious, you know that, right?  
**

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0-Please and thank ya!:D You are a very good person.:3 lol.  
**

**LadyWillowTree- Yaaaiiieeeeyyy!:D I am soooo.... happy... Maybe its the sushi talking but....... life.... is...... BEAUTIFUL. No, not really=p. Lol. ~ yay! L is not impressed. 0.o He's like..... Save me..... Yeah, I hate my short chapters, but that one wasn't too bad.:) It took me FOREVER, though, cause I was UBER busy.0.o Okay, whatever you say~3333 Hey! That rhymed~  
**

**Kaaayyytteee- Why, thank you~.:)  
**

**Well, I don't own Death Note, Chevrolet, Best Buy, or Working Class Hero by Green Day. I do own my OC, Ren.  
**

* * *

_Thump._

"Mmmmmmfffff......."

_Poke. Shove._

"MMMMMMFFFFFFFFF!!!!!"

"Get. Up."

"Nooooo......" I whined. I was tired and didn't want to move at all.

"Come on, we have to get ready for the job interviews." I rolled over and put a pillow over my head. No way in hell was I getting up without a fight.

"Fine, but you asked for it." I chuckled, but Matt grabbed my waist and heaved me out of the bed. He put me down in the bathroom and slid my suitcase in there too.

"Get showered and dressed. We'll be leaving in a few, but leave me some hot water." I sighed.

"Fine." I washed my hair with some dollar green apple shampoo and conditioner, and used the shampoo for body wash. I got dressed fancy-ish (as far as "fancy" goes in my wardrobe.) and left Matt to shower. When he came out, he looked very dapper.

"How do I look?" I looked his outfit over. He still had on his usual striped shirt, but put a while collared shirt under it, was wearing black pants, and very nice black vans.

"Like a million bucks and a pair of skate shoes." He smiled at me.

"Thanks, and you don't look too bad, yourself." I rolled my eyes. I had on a black dress that was strapless, but a white collared shirt with short, puffy sleeves under it. The top of the dress looked like a corset, and cinched in the back with a small bow and ribbon, and the skirt went to my knee's with a bit of lace under it. I had on knee high white socks and a pair of black converse.

"Eh. Not sure its really "job interview" material."

"If you were applying at MY work, you'd be hired just like that." I hit him on the back of his head.

"Lets go, lover boy. Mello will be angry if we don't become 'useful'." He looked at me solemnly.

"He didn't mean it like that, he ju-"

"I don't need an explanation or a justification from you, Matt. I'm not a little kid, and neither is Mello. He has the problem, not you. Not me. Lets get going." We walked outside to go to the car dealership. I don't know what kind of car it was, but Matt sure did like it.

"How much?"

"Around $31,000. That sound good?"

"YES!!!!" I shoved him.

"Sounds okay.... lets go pay, Matt." I handed him the credit card and typed in the code.

"You're a little short there, ma'am."

"How much is 'a little short', per say?"

"Well.... Your bank account only has $700 in it." Of course, Roger. Don't completely disregard us, but screw us over anyway.

"God DAMMIT!" I stormed off, yelling for Matt to follow. He apologized to the man, flustered, as he followed behind.

"I-It's okay. We can walk to the interviews." I laughed as I whipped a drop of sweat of my forehead.

"In this weather? In these clothes!? It's hotter than hell outside! I'm not used to this weather...." Matt had stopped paying attention and went to look at another car. This one was parked on the road, obviously not for sale. But by the looks of it, it was for sale not long ago.

"A brand new Chevy Camaro." Matt whistled in approval.

"A 2011 Chevy Camaro?!"

"By the looks of it, yeah. Wow." It was certainly worth the wow. A brand new red Chevy. With the top down and everything.

"Nice. Black leather interior, too!" He was right. It was swanky. And it still had the keys in it.

"Ma......Ma.....MATT!!!!"

"What?"

"GET IN!"

"I can't hot wire a car! Not yet, at least........"

"NO!!! The keys!"

"We don't have them!" I slapped my forehead.

"THEY'RE IN THE IGNITION!!!!" He looked wide eyed at the car.

"This person does not deserve this car." I nodded and rested my hands lightly on his chest, looking up at him.

"That's right. Now, get in the drivers side and put the top up. I don't want my hair messed up."

".....OH! Yeah, sure thing." He jumped into the drivers seat and turned on the car, putting the hood up. I opened the other door and hopped into it, reaching over and pulling the jobs sections of the news paper from Matt's front pocket.

"Where to?" I looked through the listings.

"Taco Bell?" He sighed.

"We'd eat the food and get fired." I chuckled.

"True, true." I looked through the other listings and fell upon the perfect one.

"You got one?" I looked up with excitement on my face.

"Best Buy!!! Lets work at Best Buy!"

"Okay. Where to?"

"YAY!!! We're working at Best Buy." He laughed.

"We have to get hired first, Ren." I lowered my head.

"Oh..... Never mind. Turn left here." We drove down the highway to an exit and pulled into the parking lot. Matt stepped out and slid over the hood to open my door. I mumbled.

"Show off." He looked down at me as I stood up.

"What?"

"Nothing. Thanks for opening my door." I replied shakily. He smiled, unfazed.

"No problem. Hey, you excited?" I rolled my eyes. Or course. He's excited and hyper about working at Best Buy. Best not spoil his good mood.

"Yeah, extremely! We better go and get the jobs before we get ahead of ourselves." He nodded and we walked into the store. A man wearing the uniform smiled and told us where to go. I was first.

* * *

A man sat in the midst of a nicely decorated office. Mahogany table with a dark stain, light blue-green walls with a bamboo flooring. He had paintings hanging on the wall with oak frames. Two matching vases bordered the doorway, green with streaks making them look old and antique. Maybe they were antique, but they contained bamboo. Obviously this man had a thing for zen or Japanese themed rooms. He was a normal looking man, black hair, cut slightly short, with brown eyes and tan-ish skin. He wore a white collared shirt, tucked into his pants and black pants with a belt. No tie and the shirt was slightly unbuttoned at the collar. He had a fan going in there along with the air conditioning.

"Hello. I take it you're here to apply for the job?" He smiled at me.

"Uh. Yes, sir." I smiled back awkwardly and he shook my hand.

"Sit. Please." I looked around and found a bamboo stool with a green cushion on top. I sat down in front of him as he looked over my paperwork. There wasn't much, because we never had jobs at Whammy's. We got allowances, but now we had to work. It makes me feel like those rich snobs that never lifted a finger their whole lives. Without any experience prior, it would be very hard to get a job. Especially since me and Matt never did finish school there. He looked over my papers and he put them onto the table, folding his hands and not looking up.

"Is there a problem, sir?"

"What's your name?"

"Ren."

"No, your full name. First and last." Shit... I'm in deep now.

"I don't.... have a last name..."

"Where's your birth certificate?" He looked up at me, making eye contact.

"I honestly don't know. Can I make a phone call really quick?

"Sure." I stepped outside and pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and dialed Watari's number.

"Hello?"

"Hey Watari. It's me, Ren."

"Yeah..... we're okay. I need some help."

* * *

I stepped back in, fear spread across my face.

"What is it?"

"He....wants to talk to you." I extended my arm outwards and handed him the cell phone, then left him in privacy, praying Watari would help us get our job. He stepped out of his office a few minutes later and sighed.

"You have the job."

"Really?!" He smiled.

"Yes. Coming from a prestigious school like that, how could I pass you up?" I smiled and ran over to Matt.

"I have the job!" He hugged me and turned to the man.

"You both have the job, actually. Be here at 9:00 AM tomorrow. What are you qualified in?" Matt brightened up further. It was like nothing bad could ever happen when he was like this. As long as he was this happy, time would stand still. It was like he and everyone around him was walking on sunshine.

"I can work in the video games, computers, or the electronics."

"I can work in the video games, movies, music, and electronics I guess."

"Alright. I am looking forward to working with you, ...."

"Matt." He shook his hand, grinning wildly.

"I'm Noah. Unfortunately, I will be off tomorrow, so you'll be with the other manager. Do what she asks and try to make a good first impression, okay?"

"Righto~" I sighed.

"He means well, honestly." Noah just laughed and I chuckled while Matt pouted.

We left and stopped at Wal-mart to pick up some cleaning supplies, then got "home".

"We're back." Matt hollered when he re-entered, though it was unnecessary. The room was so small you would've heard us enter from the bathroom if you were in the cabinet with the doors shut. I walked in and looked around. No Mello. Matt knocked on the bathroom door, but still nothing. Did he go out and get a job, too?

"Must be out." I sighed and began cleaning the bathroom, starting with the shower. I washed the sheets and we went to sleep. We had a long day ahead of us for tomorrow and we needed our rest. By 11:00 PM, Mello still wasn't home. As I fell asleep, I thought I saw a figure standing over me, but I couldn't be sure.

* * *

**_"They expect you to pick a career, when you can't really function you're so full of fear. A working class hero is something to be. A working class hero is something to be._**_**" Working Class Hero by Green Day  
**_

* * *

**I apologize for the fact that this chapter took so long to come out, but I was very busy whilst in New Jersey, so..... Yeah. :( I cranked this out while eating. 3 times~ Hurray for mastication!~ It took so long because...well. IM LAZY~ I finished while sick..... Blegh.:P  
**


	14. All That Hurts

**Whew. I am SO glad to be done with the last chapter.X3 Uhm..... It was pointed out to me by a very smart reviewer that I made some mistakes. I'd like to clear those up.^^ For the sake of my sanity, can we all pretend that it WASN'T Watari, but instead it was Roger?!:D Thanks.:)Also.... The matter of the 2011 car....... uhn... I chose it because it looked the most like his car at the time. Next time, I won't act like I know cars. I'll just be like, A mustang convertible.:D~. Anyways, I apologize, but don't be mad at me for not fixing it. I'm not feeling it. I hate that chapter with a passion for having to write it so many damn times.=_= ONWARD TO TEH REVIEWS!~!!!~!~~~~~**

**Kishi Senmatsu-xD Idk that song, tho.:DxD No, I have no intention of killing Noah, nor will he become important to the story.^^ Sorry. he's just like OH! HI! Here I am, the nice manager guy! :O xD Maybe i'll give Noah a beanie or Haha Camaro's rule~ Yeah, you haven'**

**0o grimmjow schiffer o0-:O I haven't had strawberry pocky in....YEARS!:O Lol. Oh, its np.;) I fail at replying, being seriousand writing~:D We can suck**

**LadyWillowTree-.....0.o Why is that funny?!??!XD -TT IM SO SORRY!!! IWASTIRED&ANGRY&DIDN'TWANNAWRITEIT&ARRRGGGG!!!!!TT-TT I'm going to go LIVE in the emo corner now......*slinks off to the emo corner and finishes story there* I will try... I make no guarantee's that that will happen, though.;|**

**Kaaayyytteee-:D Thanks.:) I noe...TT-TT Me too.:(**

**Ebony Dagger- Lol. Thank you.:) Well, I kinda did.^^' All except the painting part.o.o But then I had nothing to do and I was being anti-social, so I wrote the chapter.:D Thank you for your review.:)**

**Well, I don't own Death Note or Life On Standby by Hawthorne Heights. I do own my OC, Ren.  
**

* * *

When I woke up, it was to my relief to find Mello in his bed. He hadn't bothered to change, nor did he get under the sheets or anything like that, but I was glad to see he was okay. After all, a person has to be alive for you to yell at them successfully. Though it could wait till he was done sleeping. I was also relieved to find that Matt was already up. He was taking a shower, humming the Zelda theme song. While I waited for my turn in the shower, I picked up around the room. Just little things here and there that were forgotten. It was looking better now. I had cleaned the carpet, so no more stains. The bathroom was shining and white, since I washed it for about 7 hours and the bleached everything. The bed sheets were replaced and the mattresses were replaced. Everything we bought, we were taking with us when we left. I wasn't going to work this hard to give this hostel an up in the ratings. Eventually Matt got out and I grabbed my clothes. As I stepped into the shower I realized today was going to be a slow day. Yeah, don't I wish.

There was a knock on the door, but Matt was playing Famicom Disk System (What else but the original Legend Of Zelda?) and was to busy to be bothered with the simple task of answering the door. I wrapped a town around myself and stomped out of the shower.

"Thanks Matt, you don't have to get up. I'll get it."

"Uh." He never even looked up from the screen.

The knocks got more rapid and were louder. Someone has no patience.

"I'll be right there!" I yelled at the faceless knocking outside my door. The knocking got less frequent and I stumbled to the door, but it got more adgitated, and they were pounding the door harder.

"DO YOU MIND?!" I yelled through the door. "Someone is still sleeping!" I checked the peep hole, and found 4 large men standing outside. They were well built, muscles very evident on them. Could probably lift me Mello, Matt, and a car all at the same time. They all had a body like that, but one has blonde hair. He stood out most to me. Mainly because he stood not only in the middle of all these other giants, but he stood in front. I looked back at Matt with fear evident on my face. He paused his game and stood up in the middle of the room. I cautiously opened the door and peeked my head out.

"What do you want?" The man looked at me startled. I know I just got out of the shower, but I can't look THAT bad, now can I? He shook off the flustered look and began looking intimidating.

"I'm here to see the boss." I rolled my eyes.

"Sorry, wrong address. There's no boss of anything here." I went to shut the door, but he put his hand on it and leaned forward, putting his face close to mine.

"Honey, listen. Boss told us where he lived. Its urgent, so just let me scoot by and we'll be gone real fast."

"Honey? Listen, there IS no boss, I am NOT your honey, and you sure as hell can't come in here!"I went to slam the door, but he put his foot in the way. I kept pushing the door further, but he kept pushing it open more.

"Fuck off!" The door flung open and I fell back into Matt.

"That's no way to talk, lady." He stepped forward, standing in the doorway.

"Get out."

"What did you say?"

"Didn't you hear the woman? She politely asked you to leave. It's her home. I'll call the cops, so just leave." Matt stepped between me and the men standing there in our entry way. They began to laugh.

"And just what are you going to do?" Matt put his hand into his back pocket.

"I don't want any trouble. Just leave." They rolled their eyes and he took a step towards us. Matt pulled his hand out quickly and held something chrome in his hand. The men jumped back and the lead one put his hands in front of himself.

"Whoa, whoa. Take it easy there. Like I said before, we just want the boss." He flicked his head in the direction of the bed Mello was sleeping in.

"Boss of what, exactly?" Mello stood up and glared at the unwelcome sunlight radiating from the door. HE squinted, then his eyes widened so much I thought they'd fall out. The shock was replaced with confusion, but only for a spilt second before anger and rage kicked in.

"I'll take care of this." Mello said through his clenched teeth. I tried to grab Mello but he just flew through the doorway, right past me and Matt, who were left confused and unanswered as the door slammed shut in our faces.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

By the time Mello made it back in, Matt had begun playing his game boy color. I hadn't forgotten so easily about this little surprise. As soon as Mello got in the door, I wanted answers.

"What was that all about?"

"Wrong house." He answered through his still-clenched teeth.

"Don't give me that shit. They said they were sure this was the right house. They even addressed you directly. I'm not an idiot, so don't play me for one!" He stood there, unsure how to reply. By now, Matt had shut his game off and was standing. Eventually he spoke again.

"This is'nt your business, so stay out of it."

"What do you mean this isn't my business? You're not the only one who is affected by your actions, Mello! You sucked us into this whole mess. Now you just wanna fuck things up even more?!" He glared at me from his spot across from me in the room.

"If you can't take it, then go the fuck home." Everything flew by in an instant. The sound of a punch landing is all I really understood. It all happened so fast. Next thing I knew Mello had a big red mark on his face and Matt was holding his hand. After Mello went out for a "drive" things got awkward and quiet.

".... I guess we aren't going to work today, huh?" Matt said in an attempt to lighten the mood. I truly appreciated it, but I just wasn't up for the semantics.

".... I guess we can't be sure of very much right now, huh?" I said as a tear slid down my face and I walked outside. Matt, flustered, came outside to get me after about a minute. I had started walking towards the local park. Anywhere would have been good, if it meant getting away from this nightmare. This all seemed so childish. Crying over Mello's mistakes, storming off, leaving Matt to come chase me down. But I just kept walking, in a direction that held no specific purpose other than running away from all that I feared, though I knew good and well this would only offer a temporary escape from the hurt, if one at all.

Matt was still following me, but with the smoking he does and all the video games he plays, I figured I could outrun him. It's worth a shot, anyway. So when I turned around the corner of the bridge that went over the path, I took off in a full-speed sprint. I figured I could keep this up long enough to get the gamer winded so he would have to walk. That would give me time to myself. There's one thing I didn't account for, though. His legs are longer than mine. he was gaining on me when I turned and went through the jungle gym area. Lots of little kids, mothers. All that. I ran around them, hoping Matt would get entangled in the chaos. I didn't look back to see, though. I just kept running, never looking back. Eventually I gave in and collapsed to my knees. The swings were right in front of me. Just 10 ft away, so I walked off the path and sat down. Immediately afterwards, the tears flowed without end. I wasn't exactly crying, though. It just seemed like my eyes were flooded and needed to release it. I never whimpered or anything. No frown. I wore a blank expression. And I stayed like that for God knows how long.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Matt walked up to me, cigarette in mouth, a worried look on his face.

"If you were trying to give me a message that I should work out more often, I got it." I breathed out a sigh that sounded sort of like a laugh. He just sat down next to me and dropped his cigarette, putting it out with his foot. We sat there for a long time, saying nothing. Day turned to night. The sun was exchanges for the moon. Blue skies for black. Clouds for stars. Everything changes. Everything goes away. Matt stood up and offered me his hand.

"Best get home. Make sure things are all right." I knew he was talking about Mello.

"We could leave tomorrow and be back before him." I stood up on my own and walked away. Matt walked after me. He called after me, but I just kept walking. Frustrated, he ran up and grabbed my arm, spinning me around to face him.

"What's the matter with you? You know you can talk to me." I looked away, at the uneven cobblestone below my feet. I whispered my words quickly, unsure of whether or not he could actually hear them, but it has to count for something that they were spoken. We walked home in silence and when we arrived, he got on his X-Box 360. Mello wasn't home yet. He probably won't be coming home.

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_**"I need you now. More like yesterday, the last day I could see you smile. For the last time turn out the lights. My life on standby. So standby and watch this fall away and fall apart." Life On Standby by Hawthorne Heights**_

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**Well then.... Can you say DRAMA?!o.o I hope you liked this chapter.... I really want to write the next chapter, but I will put a bit of a space between the I've been busy... I hope I didn't lose my reviewers for loss of post-adge.o.o Anywho's, R&R and I hope to get the next chapter up fairly quickly.^^ Thanks everyone.:D~**


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